Expecting

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I come from a very supersitious family, where old wifes tales and jinxing are very much believed in. My Brother in law and his wife have started telling eveyone they know, suprised they didn't rent space on a billboard, they are pregnant based solely on the results of a home pregnancy test. In my family this would be the worlds biggest taboo subject for fear of jinxing the pregnancy. No announcing anything until after the first trimester.

Just curious what others think is too soon to be passing out the cigars so to speak.

 
It's all well and good to be superstitious if you want, but it's best to keep these phobias to oneself.

It only annoys other people who may not share these beliefs and you come off as a nay-sayer who only speaks of doom and gloom.

That being said my wife's family (primarily my MIL) is against baby showers for similar reasons.

It really annoyed me because we could have gotten a lot of things that we needed as cash-strapped young parents having our first child if we had a shower. Also she came off to me as "a nay-sayer who only speaks of doom and gloom."

my :2cents:

 
No announcing anything until after the first trimester.
Just curious what others think is too soon to be passing out the cigars so to speak.

I totally agree with you... Not because of superstitions though. But because nothing is worse than telling everyone your expecting then having something go wrong with the pregnancy... it makes a terrible situation even worse...

Unfortunately, we learned this the hard way....

Now, we don't tell anyone until after the 21 week ultrasound...

But to end on a happy note, the 2nd time is indeed the charm! And a charm she is!

 
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We didn't announce until after the 8 week U/S. Even then we were a little nervous telling people, but if something happens, it happens, we couldn't live in fear of "what if".

How is everyone doing that is still expecting? I went absent for a while due to work, but we are at 18 weeks and find out the sex two weeks from Wednesday.

 
That was a long time ago for me and my mom was a little uncomfortable telling people so early, but we did. You just have to do what's right for your situation.

 
WIth the first I thought we should wait 8-12 weeks just to make sure everything was ok with the pregnancy. My husband made it barely 3 weeks before he blabbed. With the second, he was on the phone while the pregnancy test was still in my hand.

 
After struggling through 3 miscarriages... We have mixed feelings. We tell our family right away after finding the pregnancy test is positive - they will find out good/bad/etc. anyway.

We left the telling of others outside the immediate family until after 13 weeks. Even then it is a little uncomfortable.

We weren't being nay-sayers, just on the side of cautious. Miscarriages are more common than people want to know - it's just not talked about. 1 in 4 known pregancies ends in miscarriage (according to my wife).

We have our (supposed to be 20 wk) 24 week ultrasound tomorrow morning. My wife is a little nervous, but I'm feeling pretty good... We might even be able to find out the sex. Up to now, the little stinker has been crossing it's legs!!!

Hope you're doing OK Texas!

 
I'm still here, just not posting much! My MIL went home Saturday and I am "officially" 37 weeks as of yesterday... at this point, if I went into labor, there would be no stopping it. I feel "done". I've got REALLY bad carpal tunnel due to swelling in my hands and wrists, so I'm pretty unproductive at work. I almost feel bad going in because I know I'm not going to get much done. I spend half my day shaking my hands trying to get feeling back into them... but if I stop going before my doc signs my short-term disability papers, the disability won't kick in until 2wks after the baby is born. <_<

 
Sorry, Snick I didn't see your last sentence about no going public until after the first trimester. That's not being superstitious that's being cautious/realistic in case things don't take properly.

Continued dwelling on potential disaster, while doing everything right and things are going really well because of superstitions now that's something else.

TD: prayers and best wishes for you and the Mrs.

TX: Good luck. Have you told the doctor about your loos of production at work? It might cause him to expedite the STD process. It does everyone a favor.

 
but if I stop going before my doc signs my short-term disability papers, the disability won't kick in until 2wks after the baby is born. <_<
You need a better doctor!

Our doctor was more than happy to offer the letter saying my wife needs time off work 4 weeks before the due date even though at that appointment my wife was just warning him in advance that she would need a letter in 2 weeks time so that she may get 2 weeks off before the due date...

For our next pregnancy, she will take the four weeks or maybe see if he can give her more!

 
Yeah, we made the mistake of telling everyone earlier for our pregnancy. We ended up miscarrying.

<<<< But for her, we waited a bit longer, and you can see how that turned out.

Good luck TD and TX. Let us know how things go.

 
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seriously TX, you need to go slap the Dr. around some and get a note.

Good luck and I'm glad to hear you are now clear of the early delivery concerns.

regarding notification of pregnancey, we held off until it was really obvious for two reasons

1- concern about miscarriage

2- to minimize the amount of time we had to listen to "how soon?"

 
Yeah... the farther I get into this pregnancy, the less I like my doctor... but it's a little late to change at 37 weeks!!!

For some reason I thought that having a female doc (and ENTIRELY female staff in the office) would make it more comfortable for regular OBGYN stuff... then, after I got pregnant I realized that male docs tend to have a much better bed-side manner AND are more sympathetic (possibly because they haven't experienced it, so they assume it's worse than it actually is?).

My doc had a baby about a year ago, and from what I can tell from her comments, had a VERY easy pregnancy. I kind of get the feeling that she thinks all pregnancies are like hers, unless something goes wrong from a medical standpoint. So, any complaint that I have gets brushed away with "Well, some people get that during pregnancy" kind of comment.

The only complaint that she has actually taken seriously was when I said I had heartburn so bad it was making me vomit... she prescribed some Nexium, and it's been fine ever since.

When I mentioned the carpal tunnel and how badly it is affecting my productivity at work, she said that if I feel like I need to take time off, I should, but that she would not say that I CAN'T work. My hubby went along to my appt last week, and spent the whole next day trying to get me an appt with ANY other OB doc in the area... but no one will take me this late in the pregnancy unless it's an emergency.

Oh well, only 3 more weeks!

 
^^Yeah... sounds like you have a lousy doctor...

We tried out a few of the doctors that specialise in prenatal. And the two we really liked were men... The woman doctor we hated because of what you said... she would just brush off any complaint or question as if our concerns were not a big deal at all... Well, they are a big deal to us. Plus all her answers were short with little or no details. The feeling we got from here was "I'm the doctor here, so just trust me"... Well we had little faith in her...

The doctor we ended up with was very patient and answered all of our questions (including the silly ones), even when he was getting behind on his other appointments... As for the note, he was more than willing to say that my wife COULDN'T work even though she was still more or less physically able to (she's an engineer too)....

Just like your car insurance, you need to shop around for doctors until you find the one that works best for you.

 
Just like your car insurance, you need to shop around for doctors until you find the one that works best for you.
Indeed... of course, when I chose this doc, I had NO intentions of getting pregnant, so I thought I'd only be seeing her once a year or so. I guess that just proves that you have to be prepared for anything!

 
Good luck Texas - hopefully the carpal tunnel eases up some. Pregnancy is really hard on the body, but one thing I've figured out from my wife is that with the violent hormone changes after birth, that pretty much every negative memory of a pregnancy get's amazingly wiped away!!! When we were talking about trying for a 3rd or not, I remember her glorifying pregnancy... I just don't quite remember it that way. hmmm.

You've got 3 more weeks (or less!). Stick in there, you're doing great. I'm a baby when it comes to pain, so I would have given up long before now.

Oh yeah, the baby was crossing his/her legs again and we couldn't get a good view today. All's well from health standpoint, but the sex is still debatable. I think it's our 3rd girl. I'd be really surprised if it's a boy.

That's right folks - 3 girls, 3 weddings, 3 colleges... I often heard good things come in 3's.

 
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