This Story Sucks
- Thread starter Dleg
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Help Support Professional Engineer & PE Exam Forum:
"I AM AFRAID SO, KLK. BUT IT MAY BE POSSIBLE, IF I CAN CONNECT TO THE INTERNET, TO GET SOME HELP."
"Well how in the hell and I supposed to get you connected to the internet, Chuck?"
"DO YOU STILL HAVE THE STORMTROOPER COMMUNICATOR, KLK?"
klk reached for her utility belt, and felt for the cylindrical communicator. It was still there. "Yeah, Chuck, I still have it."
"THE COMMUNICATOR SHOULD ALLOW YOU TO CONNECT TO THE INTERNET, IF YOU CAN FIND A JACK."
"OK, I'll give it a try." klk removed the communicator from her belt and examined it through the lenses of the stormtrooper helmet. On one end was the obvious microphone, but the other had a small protrusion that might be a jack, she thought.
As she was examining it, another stromtrooper approached her and spoke. "Is there a problem with your communicator, VQ-771?"
"Well how in the hell and I supposed to get you connected to the internet, Chuck?"
"DO YOU STILL HAVE THE STORMTROOPER COMMUNICATOR, KLK?"
klk reached for her utility belt, and felt for the cylindrical communicator. It was still there. "Yeah, Chuck, I still have it."
"THE COMMUNICATOR SHOULD ALLOW YOU TO CONNECT TO THE INTERNET, IF YOU CAN FIND A JACK."
"OK, I'll give it a try." klk removed the communicator from her belt and examined it through the lenses of the stormtrooper helmet. On one end was the obvious microphone, but the other had a small protrusion that might be a jack, she thought.
As she was examining it, another stromtrooper approached her and spoke. "Is there a problem with your communicator, VQ-771?"
klk thought fast, sweating inside the poorly ventilated plastic armor. "Um, yeah," she said, "I'm having trouble connecting to the internet and I-"
"*******! That's not an internet communicator! Get over to comms and ask for an internet model. I'll relieve you."
Surprised by how easy this had been, klk walked off, headed for the main passageway through the facility. No one even looked her way.
She paused outside the blast doors. She had no idea where the 'comms' room was, but judging by how she had been received so far, she figured she could get away with wandering around a little.
She walked down the main corridor that entered the open sub pen. She could see the sail of the Chucktown from here, and the cables that lashed it to the dock, and the bulldozers still clearing rubble and wreckage. There were several doors along the way, and a few smaller passageways that led to even more rooms. Each door was numbered and labeled, so she figured it would not take too much effort to find 'comms'. She passed by a door marked 'Armory D', another marked 'Mess 3', and another marked 'P3-N15 Extensions'. She then came to an important looking passageway that was well-lit and contained doors to many different rooms. The first one she came to read 'Comm. Dis.' She paused. Communicator distribution? Communications and dispatch? This must be it, she thought, and entered.
She tried to exit immediately and quietly, but Cutiepie had already turned around and seen her. "hey there sweetiepie whar are u doing in here. perfect timing on your part becauss i just got the meds i need to not only stop the dripping but also keep me going for hours. raaaaaawr"
"*******! That's not an internet communicator! Get over to comms and ask for an internet model. I'll relieve you."
Surprised by how easy this had been, klk walked off, headed for the main passageway through the facility. No one even looked her way.
She paused outside the blast doors. She had no idea where the 'comms' room was, but judging by how she had been received so far, she figured she could get away with wandering around a little.
She walked down the main corridor that entered the open sub pen. She could see the sail of the Chucktown from here, and the cables that lashed it to the dock, and the bulldozers still clearing rubble and wreckage. There were several doors along the way, and a few smaller passageways that led to even more rooms. Each door was numbered and labeled, so she figured it would not take too much effort to find 'comms'. She passed by a door marked 'Armory D', another marked 'Mess 3', and another marked 'P3-N15 Extensions'. She then came to an important looking passageway that was well-lit and contained doors to many different rooms. The first one she came to read 'Comm. Dis.' She paused. Communicator distribution? Communications and dispatch? This must be it, she thought, and entered.
She tried to exit immediately and quietly, but Cutiepie had already turned around and seen her. "hey there sweetiepie whar are u doing in here. perfect timing on your part becauss i just got the meds i need to not only stop the dripping but also keep me going for hours. raaaaaawr"
klk thought fast, and then brushed past Cutiepie and went straight to the dispensary counter. "I need diarrhea medicine, and fast"
She heard Cutiepie utter "ewwww" and leave the room.
The stormtrooper pharmacist turned to get the medicine, but klk stopped her. "I was only joking."
"Oh? Well, that was brilliant thinking!" the stormtrooper pharmacist replied through her amplified helmet address system. "I wish I had thought of that!"
"Yeah, that guy, especially, is bad news."
"Tell me about it! He's been in and out of here six times since he got here, for various STD meds and generic viagra." The pharmacist turned to continue organizing the pill bottles. "Did you come in with the sub?"
"Yeah!"
"Well I feel sorry for you, then. Half the crew has been in here already. Some said they haven't been able to sit down for days!"
"How do you sit down in these suits anyway?"
The pharmacist laughed. "I know! They're terrible, huh? I have no idea why they make us wear them."
She heard Cutiepie utter "ewwww" and leave the room.
The stormtrooper pharmacist turned to get the medicine, but klk stopped her. "I was only joking."
"Oh? Well, that was brilliant thinking!" the stormtrooper pharmacist replied through her amplified helmet address system. "I wish I had thought of that!"
"Yeah, that guy, especially, is bad news."
"Tell me about it! He's been in and out of here six times since he got here, for various STD meds and generic viagra." The pharmacist turned to continue organizing the pill bottles. "Did you come in with the sub?"
"Yeah!"
"Well I feel sorry for you, then. Half the crew has been in here already. Some said they haven't been able to sit down for days!"
"How do you sit down in these suits anyway?"
The pharmacist laughed. "I know! They're terrible, huh? I have no idea why they make us wear them."
"You seem to have a lot of antibiotics in here...." klk observed, with a hint of concern in her voice.
"Yeah. Those fudging over-sexed technicians keep bringing walrus herpes and sea lion syphilis down here. See that condom dispenser on the wall over there? Still as full as the day I installed it."
"Wow. How do you put up with this stuff? I would have kicked someone's *** a long time ago."
"What do you mean? We have a choice?"
"Well, sure! No one has to put up with sexual assault, or even harassment! You just file an EEOC complaint!"
The pharmacist laughed. "EEOC? Are you serious? Look, even if Palin hadn't gutted the program, who would we file with? Lord HVAC is the designated EEOC contact, and he's the worst violator! Well, actually, he isn't the worst, simply due to his small size, but you know what I mean."
"Yeah. Those fudging over-sexed technicians keep bringing walrus herpes and sea lion syphilis down here. See that condom dispenser on the wall over there? Still as full as the day I installed it."
"Wow. How do you put up with this stuff? I would have kicked someone's *** a long time ago."
"What do you mean? We have a choice?"
"Well, sure! No one has to put up with sexual assault, or even harassment! You just file an EEOC complaint!"
The pharmacist laughed. "EEOC? Are you serious? Look, even if Palin hadn't gutted the program, who would we file with? Lord HVAC is the designated EEOC contact, and he's the worst violator! Well, actually, he isn't the worst, simply due to his small size, but you know what I mean."
"I suppose you're right." klk admitted. "But, there must be something you- ... I mean we, can do about this."
The pharmacist leaned over the counter. "Like what?"
"Have you ever heard of a union?"
"No! What's a union?"
The pharmacist leaned over the counter. "Like what?"
"Have you ever heard of a union?"
"No! What's a union?"
"Admiral, sir! I have the photos from this morning's recon run over the island!"
Admiral Captain Worley took the envelope and dismissed the intelligence officer, who returned up the ornate stairway of the Clinton's Captain's Lounge, and out to the bridge. Wolverine, the Dark Knight, and Major General SapperPE gathered around as Worley spread the images over the coffee table.
"Just more walruses and sea lions!" grumbled Wolverine.
Admiral Captain Worley took the envelope and dismissed the intelligence officer, who returned up the ornate stairway of the Clinton's Captain's Lounge, and out to the bridge. Wolverine, the Dark Knight, and Major General SapperPE gathered around as Worley spread the images over the coffee table.
"Just more walruses and sea lions!" grumbled Wolverine.
The Dark Knight pulled one of the images closer and examined it carefully. "I don't think this is a walrus or a sea lion. Look here."
He cleared away Worley's scotch glass and set the image back on the table.
"That looks like a guy!" Said General Highway. "But what's he doing so close to that walrus?"
"He's fudging it!" blurted out Wolverine, laughing, and returning to the bar for another scotch.
"Aw, come on! No one fudges walruses!" Highway peered closely at the image. "Or do they?"
He cleared away Worley's scotch glass and set the image back on the table.
"That looks like a guy!" Said General Highway. "But what's he doing so close to that walrus?"
"He's fudging it!" blurted out Wolverine, laughing, and returning to the bar for another scotch.
"Aw, come on! No one fudges walruses!" Highway peered closely at the image. "Or do they?"
The image was grainy and was taken from some distance away, but the oblique angle did reveal what looked like an upright human bending slightly at the knees, and making contact with a walrus in about the correct position for human-walrus sexual relations, or so assumed Admiral Worley.
"He must have come from that native village on the other side."
"Impossible, Worley." Replied General Highway, picking up another image and pointing to it. "There's no way any human can get across this ridgeline on foot. He would have had to take a boat, and I don't see a boat anywhere there on the beach, do you?"
The four continued to examine the photographs. The Dark Knight held up an image that had been taken from more directly above the site. "If I'm not mistaken, this looks a bit like a trail leading away from the beach and up into the ridges."
General Highway snatched the image away and examined it. "I think you're right! And look! It ends at this rock there... " he picked up the previous image from the oblique angle. "A cave! That's a cave!"
"He must have come from that native village on the other side."
"Impossible, Worley." Replied General Highway, picking up another image and pointing to it. "There's no way any human can get across this ridgeline on foot. He would have had to take a boat, and I don't see a boat anywhere there on the beach, do you?"
The four continued to examine the photographs. The Dark Knight held up an image that had been taken from more directly above the site. "If I'm not mistaken, this looks a bit like a trail leading away from the beach and up into the ridges."
General Highway snatched the image away and examined it. "I think you're right! And look! It ends at this rock there... " he picked up the previous image from the oblique angle. "A cave! That's a cave!"
"Well then, we have found our way in! Let's discuss our attack plan!"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa there!" Wolverine returned from the bar with a fresh scotch. "You guys find a picture of some dude fudging a walrus, and that's all the evidence needed to determine we've found not only the island the sub pen is located on, but also the way into a reportedly impregnable fortress? Excuse me if I decide to stay behind, because walrus-fudger there isn't enough to go on in my book."
"Wolverine! We've examined every island out there, and none of them have shown any activity whatsoever! If you have a better idea, please feel free to share!" General Highway glared at the superhero.
"Yeah, I've got a better idea, let's just stay here and drink some more scotch and keep looking!"
"We don't have time for that! He's got he Mark 69, and if he activates it, well, who knows what damage he could do!" Worley had also lost patience.
"Exactly!" continued Wolverine. "Who knows? No one knows! You guys can't even explain to me what this thing does. About all I can figure is that it will destroy the internet, but those ******** have already taken the internet as their own and killed off everyone in America, so I don't see why they would want to use it! It makes no sense!"
The Dark Knight stood and moved closer to Wolverine. "I agree. None of this makes any sense."
Worley looked at General Highway and swirled his scotch while he deliberated how much he should tell them.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa there!" Wolverine returned from the bar with a fresh scotch. "You guys find a picture of some dude fudging a walrus, and that's all the evidence needed to determine we've found not only the island the sub pen is located on, but also the way into a reportedly impregnable fortress? Excuse me if I decide to stay behind, because walrus-fudger there isn't enough to go on in my book."
"Wolverine! We've examined every island out there, and none of them have shown any activity whatsoever! If you have a better idea, please feel free to share!" General Highway glared at the superhero.
"Yeah, I've got a better idea, let's just stay here and drink some more scotch and keep looking!"
"We don't have time for that! He's got he Mark 69, and if he activates it, well, who knows what damage he could do!" Worley had also lost patience.
"Exactly!" continued Wolverine. "Who knows? No one knows! You guys can't even explain to me what this thing does. About all I can figure is that it will destroy the internet, but those ******** have already taken the internet as their own and killed off everyone in America, so I don't see why they would want to use it! It makes no sense!"
The Dark Knight stood and moved closer to Wolverine. "I agree. None of this makes any sense."
Worley looked at General Highway and swirled his scotch while he deliberated how much he should tell them.
"The Mark 69 doesn't actually destroy the internet. Well, it does, but only as a side effect of its true function." Worley, drink in hand, walked to the giant picture window that comprised the starboard wall of the 2-story lounge. A blizzard raged outside, obscuring their view of all but the nearest whitecaps below. He tried to think of a way to explain what he knew, which admittedly was not as much as he would like.
"And???? What does it do, Worley?" asked Wolverine, impatiently.
Worley turned and walked to a nearby shelf along the side of the room, and took down a small laptop computer. "Say I wanted to destroy all the data on my hard drive. Name the ways I could do that."
"Well, you could simply delete it," answered Wolverine.
"You could blow it up!" answered General Highway, enthusiastically.
"You could reformat the hard drive," suggested the Dark Knight.
Worley pulled a small USB drive from his pocket. "Or...." he said, inserting the drive into a side port of the computer, "I could re-load the operating system."
The other three looked quizzically at him. :blink:
"OK, I admit, that's about all I know of the Mark 69 - its true purpose was to be used to reconfigure the Internet, in the event that one of our enemies somehow seized control of the net. It was a way to return control of the internet to us, and deny the enemy of its use. Now, I can only imagine what HVAC intends to do with it, but considering he has already seized control of the United States, he probably has some plan to similarly seize the internet."
Wolverine looked at the Dark Knight. "Well, I think that kind of goes without saying, doesn't it? What's the big deal with controlling the internet?"
Worley turned and faced Wolverine, swirling the ice cubes around in his glass. "This is where things get a little weird."
(p. 115)
"And???? What does it do, Worley?" asked Wolverine, impatiently.
Worley turned and walked to a nearby shelf along the side of the room, and took down a small laptop computer. "Say I wanted to destroy all the data on my hard drive. Name the ways I could do that."
"Well, you could simply delete it," answered Wolverine.
"You could blow it up!" answered General Highway, enthusiastically.
"You could reformat the hard drive," suggested the Dark Knight.
Worley pulled a small USB drive from his pocket. "Or...." he said, inserting the drive into a side port of the computer, "I could re-load the operating system."
The other three looked quizzically at him. :blink:
"OK, I admit, that's about all I know of the Mark 69 - its true purpose was to be used to reconfigure the Internet, in the event that one of our enemies somehow seized control of the net. It was a way to return control of the internet to us, and deny the enemy of its use. Now, I can only imagine what HVAC intends to do with it, but considering he has already seized control of the United States, he probably has some plan to similarly seize the internet."
Wolverine looked at the Dark Knight. "Well, I think that kind of goes without saying, doesn't it? What's the big deal with controlling the internet?"
Worley turned and faced Wolverine, swirling the ice cubes around in his glass. "This is where things get a little weird."
(p. 115)
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"Gore says..." Worley hesitated. "Gore has.... created a whole new world in the internet. Well, more than just a world. An entire parallel universe, if you will. I've been in there myself and have seen it."
Wolverine laughed out loud. "You've got to be fudging kidding me!"
"No, I'm not. It's a whole world. You can go inside and it's as real as this world, although it is a little different." Worley walked back to the window. "And that's not all."
Wolverine laughed out loud. "You've got to be fudging kidding me!"
"No, I'm not. It's a whole world. You can go inside and it's as real as this world, although it is a little different." Worley walked back to the window. "And that's not all."
"Gore says our world is the internet for some other world." Worley turned back to the table. "And he proved it to me."
Wolverine scoffed. "How?"
"It's tough to explain, but you remember physics class?" General Highway nodded, while Wolverine and the Dark Knight just looked at him skeptically. "What's one thing you can never do?"
"I know a few things you should never do...." laughed Wolverine. "Getting married comes to mind!"
Worley continued. "You can't travel faster than the speed of light, right? Nothing can!" Worley walked to the bar and poured more scotch in his tumbler. "So we can see all this stuff out there in our universe, right, that is billions and billions of light years away from us, so basically it is impossible to go anywhere else than just immediatley around Earth and our solar system."
Wolverine sat and shook his head. Worley returned from the bar and went on. "Gore took me, in an instant, ten billion light years away from the Earth, to a galaxy cluster that Hubble had imaged twenty five years previously."
Wolverine stood up and headed for the bar himself, laughing to himself. The Dark Knight just looked at Worley, with no expression on his face.
Worley walked back to the window. "And then he told me to reach out and touch it, and I did, and it was nothing but a hologram. I guess. I don't know what it was. But basically, it wasn't even there. It was all just an image pasted onto our skies." Worley turned around. "Just like the sky in Grand Theft Auto, or any other video game. And then we returned, and basically, all we did was just step right back down onto the Earth. None of it was real."
Wolverine drank straight from the bottle then wiped his mouth. "That," he looked up at Admiral Worley, "is the biggest load of **** I have ever heard."
The Dark Knight finally spoke. "So, are we real?"
Wolverine scoffed. "How?"
"It's tough to explain, but you remember physics class?" General Highway nodded, while Wolverine and the Dark Knight just looked at him skeptically. "What's one thing you can never do?"
"I know a few things you should never do...." laughed Wolverine. "Getting married comes to mind!"
Worley continued. "You can't travel faster than the speed of light, right? Nothing can!" Worley walked to the bar and poured more scotch in his tumbler. "So we can see all this stuff out there in our universe, right, that is billions and billions of light years away from us, so basically it is impossible to go anywhere else than just immediatley around Earth and our solar system."
Wolverine sat and shook his head. Worley returned from the bar and went on. "Gore took me, in an instant, ten billion light years away from the Earth, to a galaxy cluster that Hubble had imaged twenty five years previously."
Wolverine stood up and headed for the bar himself, laughing to himself. The Dark Knight just looked at Worley, with no expression on his face.
Worley walked back to the window. "And then he told me to reach out and touch it, and I did, and it was nothing but a hologram. I guess. I don't know what it was. But basically, it wasn't even there. It was all just an image pasted onto our skies." Worley turned around. "Just like the sky in Grand Theft Auto, or any other video game. And then we returned, and basically, all we did was just step right back down onto the Earth. None of it was real."
Wolverine drank straight from the bottle then wiped his mouth. "That," he looked up at Admiral Worley, "is the biggest load of **** I have ever heard."
The Dark Knight finally spoke. "So, are we real?"
"Yes!" Worley replied, with a reassuring certainty. "Our world is our world, for better or worse, it is all that exists for us. Well, until this new world that Gore created came into existence, anyway."
"Are you saying Gore is some sort of ... Diety?" Asked the Dark Knight.
"No, not at all. He just invented the internet. Well, actually, even he admits he didn't have much to do with the actual invention. But once the internet got beyond a certain stage, to the point at which a rudimentary new universe could exist within it, Gore was contacted by ..." Worley swallowed and looked troubled, for the first time during this extraordinary conversation, "by something ... some being ... that cannot be named, but is the single most evil entity in all universes, apparently."
"Are you saying Gore is some sort of ... Diety?" Asked the Dark Knight.
"No, not at all. He just invented the internet. Well, actually, even he admits he didn't have much to do with the actual invention. But once the internet got beyond a certain stage, to the point at which a rudimentary new universe could exist within it, Gore was contacted by ..." Worley swallowed and looked troubled, for the first time during this extraordinary conversation, "by something ... some being ... that cannot be named, but is the single most evil entity in all universes, apparently."
Now Worley sat on the plush red velvet couch, opposite the couch where General Highway and the Dark Knight sat. "Apparently there's a cycle to all of this. When the internet for one world progresses to the point that it develops its own internet, that's the time that He moves into that world, and takes it over. All the good stuff moves forward into the new universe, and so on and so forth, and it has been that way ever since, etcetera etcetera." Worley gestured with his hands, clearly approaching the limits of his understanding.
"So our world is ending?" asked the Dark Knight.
"No, it's just being taken over by this evil entity. All the good is leaving it, and moving into the new world. But our world will go on, it will just ... suck. I guess."
"So what's the deal with the Mark 69 already?" General Highway had grown impatient.
"Oh, yes. Well, this is why I believe this is important. See, this evil being, he can't take over a new world until it has run its course, and has created a new, new world for all the good stuff to move into. But this Mark 69 thing gives Him a chance to wipe all the good stuff out of the new world - our internet - before the new world can create another new world, and thus, He can break the cycle forever, and wipe out good .... forever."
"So our world is ending?" asked the Dark Knight.
"No, it's just being taken over by this evil entity. All the good is leaving it, and moving into the new world. But our world will go on, it will just ... suck. I guess."
"So what's the deal with the Mark 69 already?" General Highway had grown impatient.
"Oh, yes. Well, this is why I believe this is important. See, this evil being, he can't take over a new world until it has run its course, and has created a new, new world for all the good stuff to move into. But this Mark 69 thing gives Him a chance to wipe all the good stuff out of the new world - our internet - before the new world can create another new world, and thus, He can break the cycle forever, and wipe out good .... forever."
"What do you mean, 'good'?" asked DK.
"Good question! According to Gore, basically, it's freedom. Under the rule of He Who Must Not Be Named, the world is all rules and no freedom. He decides everything for you. That's why he took out America. Too much freedom. It's too chaotic and messy for his kind of world. He wants everywhere to be more like ... like Europe, I guess."
"Good question! According to Gore, basically, it's freedom. Under the rule of He Who Must Not Be Named, the world is all rules and no freedom. He decides everything for you. That's why he took out America. Too much freedom. It's too chaotic and messy for his kind of world. He wants everywhere to be more like ... like Europe, I guess."
Wolverine turned away from the bar, holding the bottle. "I can't take this anymore! You drop acid with Gore, or-"
"Mushrooms, to be specific" Worley interjected, deadpan.
"Mushrooms! Excellent! And you have some hallucination about seeing galaxies and stars and woooooo!" Wolverine waved his hands around in front of him. "You believe every word that fraud tells you!"
"Well how do you explain what we have seen so far, Wolvie?" Worley asked, indignant. "People's heads exploding? The US falling in a day?"
"I don't know! I have no explanation! I don't care what the explanation is! All I need to know is where this ******* is, so I can kill him!"
"Mushrooms, to be specific" Worley interjected, deadpan.
"Mushrooms! Excellent! And you have some hallucination about seeing galaxies and stars and woooooo!" Wolverine waved his hands around in front of him. "You believe every word that fraud tells you!"
"Well how do you explain what we have seen so far, Wolvie?" Worley asked, indignant. "People's heads exploding? The US falling in a day?"
"I don't know! I have no explanation! I don't care what the explanation is! All I need to know is where this ******* is, so I can kill him!"
Worley set his glass down on the coffee table hard. "No! That is not enough this time, Wolverine! If you go barging in there, killing everyone in your way, and somehow He still manages to fire off the Mark 69, you may have personally sentenced the entire multiverse to an eternity of boredom and toil! Don't you understand? No more ****! No more dirty jokes! No more goofing off! No more Metallica! NO MORE BEER!"
Wolverine dropped his glass. Highway gasped. Even the Dark Knight raised an eyebrow.
Wolverine dropped his glass. Highway gasped. Even the Dark Knight raised an eyebrow.
"Wait a minute," Wolverine looked puzzled. "How does the internet provide beer?"
Worley had grown impatient. "I've already told you! He Who Must Not Be Named aims to take over all worlds, not just the internet! By taking over the internet, before the internet creates a new internet, he controls everything! No more beer, in no worlds, forever!"
"Well why didn't you just say that in the first place? I'm sold." Wolverine looked around the room. DK and General Highway nodded in approval.
Worley had grown impatient. "I've already told you! He Who Must Not Be Named aims to take over all worlds, not just the internet! By taking over the internet, before the internet creates a new internet, he controls everything! No more beer, in no worlds, forever!"
"Well why didn't you just say that in the first place? I'm sold." Wolverine looked around the room. DK and General Highway nodded in approval.
Worley stood again. "Well OK then. We need to follow the trail of the walrus fudger, since we haven't found anything else, at all, on any of the other islands out there. And we need to find a way to get you and a team on that island. And that's not going to be easy." He turned and walked to the window again, looking out at the driving snow.
"Why not? Just drop me and the Dark Knight on the beach from a V-40, and we'll take care of walrus boy. And, NO seals this time! I don't want to get shot again."
"Well, see, that's the problem..." Worley cleared his throat. "We accidentally rolled the last V-40 off the treadmill yesterday."
Wolverine rolled his eyes, but was no longer surprised by tales of aircraft, equipment, and people being conveyed accidentally overboard. "Fine, send us by helicopter."
Worley looked down and cleared his throat again. "We... lost the last helicopter a week ago."
"Parachute us in from an S-3, or a C-17?"
"Nope. All gone."
"Do you have anything left that can fly us off this piece of ****?"
"Honestly?" Worley sipped from his glass, phrasing his response in his mind. "We have only one aircraft left, the photo-recon F-35 that took those pictures. It carries one pilot only." He swirled the ice cubes around again. "There is one other way, but it's risky."
"I hope you understand if I don't trust my life to anything you consider 'risky'. Don't you have a boat we could take on shore? The ship's launch?"
Worley turned back to face Wolverine. "Yes. Technically it is a flying boat, but ... Yes."
"Why not? Just drop me and the Dark Knight on the beach from a V-40, and we'll take care of walrus boy. And, NO seals this time! I don't want to get shot again."
"Well, see, that's the problem..." Worley cleared his throat. "We accidentally rolled the last V-40 off the treadmill yesterday."
Wolverine rolled his eyes, but was no longer surprised by tales of aircraft, equipment, and people being conveyed accidentally overboard. "Fine, send us by helicopter."
Worley looked down and cleared his throat again. "We... lost the last helicopter a week ago."
"Parachute us in from an S-3, or a C-17?"
"Nope. All gone."
"Do you have anything left that can fly us off this piece of ****?"
"Honestly?" Worley sipped from his glass, phrasing his response in his mind. "We have only one aircraft left, the photo-recon F-35 that took those pictures. It carries one pilot only." He swirled the ice cubes around again. "There is one other way, but it's risky."
"I hope you understand if I don't trust my life to anything you consider 'risky'. Don't you have a boat we could take on shore? The ship's launch?"
Worley turned back to face Wolverine. "Yes. Technically it is a flying boat, but ... Yes."
