Corrupt a Wish!

[Supe]

Granted. Your boss successfully used his street smarts to get the cops off his back by planting the drugs in your desk. You're now serving a 15 year felony possession charge.

I wish I could get rid of this cough.

 

[Ble_PE]

Granted, you've just been given a year's supply of laxatives.

I wish we could get some work for our office.

 

[Supe]

Granted. You're now part of a traveling sketch comedy group known as the "Office Clowns," fully equipped with Bozo attire for children's birthday parties.

I wish I didn't have to babysit this afternoon.

 

[jeb6294]

Granted. Someone found all the kiddie **** on your computer so you get to spend the next few years bunking with "Icepick" and once you get out you won't be allowed to live within 1000' of kids ever again.

I wish someone would buy our house.

 

[Chucktown PE]

Granted. Someone found all the kiddie **** on your computer so you get to spend the next few years bunking with "Icepick" and once you get out you won't be allowed to live within 1000' of kids ever again.
I wish someone would buy our house.

Done. I just purchased your house for $1. If you'd like I'll sell it back to you for $500,000.

I wish I was finished with this stinking stormwater permit.

 

[Dexman PE]

Granted. You are now the greatest stormwater modeler of all time, but forever banned from eb.com

I wish everyone on this project didn't have my cellphone number and would use the office number instead.

 

[Ble_PE]

Granted, but now the telemarketers have your cell phone number.

I wish I didn't have to help my brother move this weekend.

 

[Supe]

Done. You're a vegetable, and nobody expects much of anything from you anymore.

I wish our HR department would be wiped off the face of the planet.

 

[Dexman PE]

Granted. HR is now under the control of the Obama administration

I wish my boss would hire that hot EIT who interviewed here a month ago.

 

[roadwreck]

Granted. Your boss just hired the 400lb guy that was sweating a lot.

I wish it were 5 o'clock.

 

[MA_PE]

Granted. Your boss just hired the 400lb guy that was sweating a lot.
I wish it were 5 o'clock.

done it's no 5:00, quiiting time, and you are leaving your job sewing sneakers for Nike in a sweat shop in Malaysia.

I wish I were wealthy enough to retire comfortably.

 

[Ble_PE]

Done, you are now wealthy enough to retire, but it's in Somalia.

I wish I could go to the beach.

 

[Dexman PE]

Done, you now have oceanfront property near chucktown't government post in Greenland.

I wish I didn't have to attend this conference call with the project owners.

 

[Ble_PE]

Granted, instead you have to artificially inseminate Ester, the elephant at the zoo.

I wish I could have a beer.

 

[Supe]

Granted. Enjoy your O'Douls.

I wish I had something good for dinner in the fridge.

 

[cement]

I wish I had something good for dinner in the fridge.

good luck with that



I wish this RFP would write itself.

 

[MA_PE]

I wish this RFP would write itself.

Done. Now you just have to organize and proofread it and make 100 copies for distribution.

I wish I understood the all the details of the Obamacare bill.

 

[Supe]

Granted. Unfortunately, the government can't have anyone completely aware of all the ******** they packed into it, so they put a hit out on you.

I wish my doctor's appointment was at 7:00 instead of 9:00.

 

[Ble_PE]

Granted, but it was at 7 yesterday, so now you have to wait 2 weeks for another opening.

I wish my vacation would hurry up and get here.

 

[Master slacker]

Granted. Your boss hopes your vacation goes well, but asks that you don't bother coming back if you actually go.

I wish my student loans would just disappear.