Bad advice to previous poster

[knight1fox3]

Phone a friend during the exam.

Should I leave work early to go work on my final project?

 

[Dark Knight]

No. Do it at work

Should I go home now?

 

[matt267 PE]

No, go to your girl friends house but tell your wife you're still at work.

When should I buy a boat?

 

[Ship Wreck PE]

Tonight on Craigslist

What should I do at work tomorrow?

 

[matt267 PE]

Sell me your boat on Craigslist.

How much should I offer SW for his boat?

 

[Ship Wreck PE]

$1 M plus shipping

Should I throw in life jackets and EPIRB??

 

[matt267 PE]

No, that stuff is for *******.

How can I get $1M by morning?

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Sell hookers and blow.

How do I convince my neighbor to let me watch the DVR'd back episodes of Game of Thrones he has?

 

[matt267 PE]

Offer him top quality hookers and blow. (PM me)

When is it time for a new car?

 

[Lumber Jim]

When the fast food bags begin to compost...

What's the best way to find parts that my lawn mower lost in the yard?

 

[TESTY]

Buy a new, expensive mower, and mow over them.

What is the best way to cut open a propane tank, (which the tank co won't pick up), so I can make a smoker out of it?

 

[Lumber Jim]

Have it filled one more time then weld the pressure relief closed (preferably with oxy-acetylene) and then build a fire under it. The fire needs to be about 2000 degrees so use plenty of wood and the accelerant of your choosing. It'll split so that you will be left with a body and a cover ... trust me.

What should I get my wife for Mother's Day?

 

[envirotex]

A vacuum cleaner (trust me).

What color should I paint my house?

 

[Lumber Jim]

cow patty.

How do I make it up to my wife after the vacuum cleaner purchase?

 

[matt267 PE]

Tell her that with the vacuum cleaner, she can now leave the kitchen.

How do I make life more interesting?

 

[Golden Eagle PE]

Go streaking at a major sporting event.

How do I get my wife to let me watch more sports?

 

[TESTY]

Get Divorced.

How do I get to watch more sports, (without getting divorced), by adding what type of high tech wife monitoring/distracting equipment to my "man cave"?

 

[envirotex]

Invite Channing Tatum and Ryan Gosling to the man cave.

Should I keep the St. Augustine in my yard or go with another variety of grass?

 

[matt267 PE]

Over seed with a variety of grass called "crab grass." Its self seeding and fills in bare spots.

Should we go to the air show in the rain?

 

[knight1fox3]

Yes but go in a hot air balloon.

How do I get rid of this cramp in my neck?