Bad advice to previous poster

[Supe]

Supe in a speedo sittin on the hood.

Not sure what provoked this one, but LOL. And totally true.

Senile dog? Give it to a senile old man. Every day is a new beginning!

My mouth has a hot sauce aftertaste. What should I do to get rid of it?

 

[Ship Wreck PE]

Start Smoking

I want to try something new. Where should I go for lunch?

 

[Supe]

Guolizhuang - look it up.

My coffee tastes terrible - how can I fix it?

 

[Dark Knight]

Try hot chocolate.

I want to retire but still have at least 20 more years to go. What can I do?

 

[snickerd3]

spend your life savings at the casino to try to win big so you can retire early

what should I get the boss for christmas?

 

[Dark Knight]

A book: 50 Shades of Gray

What should I get for mine?

 

[Supe]

Also a book! "The Other Side of the Closet: The Coming-Out Crisis for Straight Spouses and Families".

What should I make my new router password for protection against neighbors too cheap to pay for internet?

 

[snickerd3]

cheap ass punk

whats the best way to tell someone they smell?

 

[Capt Worley PE]

Hold your nose and say 'peeee-yooo!' every time they walk by.

What's the best way to avoid being followed by the black choppers?

 

[Ship Wreck PE]

Drive Fast

How do I keep everyone from turning the thermostat up and down?

 

[Supe]

Attach an alarm clock, some wire, and a bundle of red dowel rods to it.

How can I get out of work early to enjoy this gorgeous day?

 

[iahim]

Go to your boss and tell him to go f..ck himself.

Can I take a bath if I have diarrhea?

 

[knight1fox3]

Attach an alarm clock, some wire, and a bundle of red dowel rods to it.

How can I get out of work early to enjoy this gorgeous day?

Call in a bomb threat.

How can I get my homework done while watching Mon. Night football at the same time?

 

[Supe]

Write "Patriots Suck!" and hope for a lenient professor.

How should I ask if we're getting a year end salary increase?

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Threaten a HSD on the bosses desk

How do I convince the vendors to send my Camaro parts faster?

 

[Supe]

Send relentless hate mail, threatening to spam every message board imaginable.

Have to drop an HSD, but want to beat the traffic. What to do?

 

[Sapper PE LS]

HSD in the fast lane bro.

How do I prepare my kids for the zombie apocalypse since they are scared to watch zombie movies with me?

 

[goodal]

Stop, drop and roll.

How do I convince the powers that be to close the office for the week at noon on Wednesday?

 

[knight1fox3]

Bomb threat.

How should I cook my turkey this week?

 

[Ble_PE]

Blow torch.

How do I keep myself from eating too much on Thursday?