I got another date!

[Fudgey]

After a couple years of striking out, the Fudgeman has himself another date lined up for this evening. I struck up a conversation while getting my car worked on with a lovely woman who works for an accounting firm. I went for it and asked her out, and to my surprise, she said yes!

We are going to some fancy new tapas place that opened up here recently. I'd be happy with pizza and beer, so it's trendy, so what the hell.

I've been putting in a lot of extra house lately, so I am going to take the day off. First thing I am going to do is shave everything from the waist down in case things get spicy tonight. I haven't had a date in a while, so the manscaping will take some time.

As some of the old timers here may remember, my last serious relationship was marred by one or two excretory indiscretions, so I need to find something for lunch that will really clean me out before tonight. You know, the classic pre-game dump! I would really prefer not to have any accidents around this gal. Any suggestions?

Also, what about flowers? Classy or pushy?

Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[RIP - VTEnviro]

Fudgey - you're a fiend around the ladies.

As for lunch, I recommend a corn and Maalox smoothie.

Also, don't leave the house with a loaded weapon.

 

[Krakosky]

I've read your other relationship thread and an looking forward to actually being around for this one. I'm an EB noob, but I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say welcome back! As for flowers, I recommend gerber daisies; they're beautiful and fun but not over the top. Good luck!

 

[Dark Knight]

Fudge Master, I would suggest drinking 7UP, or anything with lemon to protect yourself against excretory(sic) events. Also, and very important, check out VT's last line advice. That is very important, specially if you have not fired the gun in a while.

And by the way, let me introduce you to Krak...

Krak - Fudgey

Fudgey - Krak

I think you too would make a heck of a couple.

 

[Master slacker]

I don't think a Fudgey Krak would be too pleasant...

Anywho, drink mad amounts of coffee this morning to flush out ye olde conveyor belt o' poo. And fire off a few rounds before the date as mentioned already. Sucks having to execute the "poner" at dinner.

 

[RIP - VTEnviro]

And no AC Slatering on the first date. If you have to go, use classic mode.

Fudgey - as a newly single guy with no prospects, I'm relying on living vicariously through you this summer. Make it happen!

 

[Chucktown PE]

Welcome back Fudgemeister.

I would recommend that you eat a diet high in fiber today and take a laxative at around 2:00. Then at 6:00 you'll need to take two Immodium-AD. I think that will probably stop you up.

Good luck.

 

[Chucktown PE]

And I second VT's comment, no exotic stuff when using the restroom for the first 12 months of this relationship. Go to the bathroom, do your business (facing forward), and get out.

 

[Master slacker]

Speaking of poo, why don't animated avatars work anymore?

 

[RIP - VTEnviro]

I miss ODB and Squishles in topics like these.

 

[engineergurl]

Welcome back Fudgeman... listen to the guys and do the opposite.

I miss Squish!

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Chipotle or Qdoba burrito with extra spicy salsa. Maybe add a spoonful of the corn salsa too.

Welcome back fudge man!

 

[YMZ PE]

Welcome back Fudgey!

You can kill two birds with one stone and tweeze everything from the waist down instead of shaving. The pain will make you puke, and that should trigger some loosening action in a different part of the tummy. I tried this once, but couldn't stop sneezing. I don't know what it is with me and tweezers.

 

[Supe]

A light lunch should help. I would recommend cuttlefish and asparagus.

 

[YMZ PE]

^ Yeah, definitely not the vanilla pudding.

 

[Kephart P.E.]

Keep it simple at dinner Fudgey, those tapas dishes can be very rich.

 

[Krakosky]

Save the spice for in the bedroom!

 

[Chucktown PE]

Fudgey needs no help in that department. He likes to share what he eats with his lovers.

 

[envirotex]

I've read your other relationship thread and an looking forward to actually being around for this one. I'm an EB noob, but I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say welcome back! As for flowers, I recommend gerber daisies; they're beautiful and fun but not over the top. Good luck!

Gerbera daisies are my favorite.

Welcome back Fudgey!

You can kill two birds with one stone and tweeze everything from the waist down instead of shaving. The pain will make you puke, and that should trigger some loosening action in a different part of the tummy. I tried this once, but couldn't stop sneezing. I don't know what it is with me and tweezers.

Threading. Although, I can't imagine a brazilian would be all that pleasant with that technique.

 

[Krakosky]

So what'd you decide on for lunch? And don't forget the gerber daisies! At least one.