Bad advice to previous poster

[einatlanta PhD PE]

Whoops........sorry about those. Being an engineer I could not rent a room for my hookers and had to substitute vodka instead of blow. I will call Candy and Dee-Lishus to come out and help clean up so you should be good to go!!

It is cinco de mayo......do I go out to get lit at the local mexican bar and hit on random women or should I sit at the house drinking water to feel great for tomorrow?

 

[Dleg]

Whoops........sorry about those. Being an engineer I could not rent a room for my hookers and had to substitute vodka instead of blow. I will call Candy and Dee-Lishus to come out and help clean up so you should be good to go!!

It is cinco de mayo......do I go out to get lit at the local mexican bar and hit on random women or should I sit at the house drinking water to feel great for tomorrow?

2 words: Donkey Show.

I recently learned that propane is not a good fuel for Alaska, because it basically stops flowing once it gets below -25F or so.  Unfortunately the house I bought has both a propane range and fireplace, and the tanks are exposed outside. How should I keep them warm enough to flow in the winter?

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Move the tank into the living room and modify it so it can double as a couch.

A lazy coworker doesn't want to address the comments I forwarded him on my project before he goes on vacation next week. Problem is that I need to have the comments addressed before I leave for good (before he gets back). How should I motivate him to get his shit done?

 

[Dleg]

Lean on the corner of his cubicle and say nothing.  Just stare at him.  He'll figure it out eventually.

My daughter is coming home from college next week, and the furniture store still hasn't delivered the bed for her new room.  What will I do with her if the bed still hasn't been delivered when she gets here?

 

[einatlanta PhD PE]

She can stay with some 'friends' of mine.........Candy and Dee-Lishus. They always have extra beds.

Which psychiatrist should I go to after trying to forget the Donkey Show that I just witnessed?

 

[PE-ness]

The same one you see about your short man syndrome.

I've been having a problem with stiffness in the morning. Is this something I should try to rub out myself, or should I get a professional to massage it until the stiffness goes away?

 

[Bcbillings]

I've been having a problem with stiffness in the morning. Is this something I should try to rub out myself, or should I get a professional to massage it until the stiffness goes away?

Hire one to come to your house then Lock them in the basement so you can get messages on Demand.

I recently took out a second mortgage because I have a feeling I will hit big on red at the casino, should I do it?

 

[einatlanta PhD PE]

No, you should spend the money on something with a much better return.............hookers and blow.

Do I get a new car or keep rebuilding my current car like Johnny Cash did in his song 'One Piece At a Time'?

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Both. Buy a new car and replace every part with aftermarket upgrades.

Debating buying a scooter when I move to NZ for commuting purposes. Any suggestions?

 

[Dleg]

How do I convince my 19yo daughter that her boyfriend really has dumped her, when he keeps calling back to say they're still friends and wants her to come hang out?

 

[einatlanta PhD PE]

call a hitman on the dude....time heals all wounds when she forgets him (an ice cream might help also).

I have two dates this week with different women. How do I make sure I get their names right when I am out with them?

 

[southernbelle]

Just keep stuffing $20's down their blouses and they won't even care.

I have an appointment with the dentist next week.  How should I prepare?

 

[matt267 PE]

Stop brushing and flossing and eat nothing but sticky candy until the appointment. Make them earn their pay.

How do I stop the poison ivy on my ankle from itching? 

 

[Dleg]

Cut off your foot just above the ankle.

How do I let my employees know that I don't appreciate them coming to me constantly asking for comp time for every little overage?

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Kill the little one and put his head on a spike outside your office as a warning.

I need more time to finish things around the house before I fly out but i cant change my scheduled flight. Suggestions?

 

[einatlanta PhD PE]

gasoline and matches (you might even get to the airport early).

I accidentally texted the wrong woman that it was great last night. How do I fix it?

 

[Dleg]

Text her back and say "My masturbatory fantasy about you, that is. Would you like to make it real? You really enjoyed it, too."

My grant officer told me that hookers & blow is not an allowable expense. How else can I spend the remaining money in my grant?

 

[einatlanta PhD PE]

just expense it as 'entertainment' and 'medical costs'

I just passed the pe......how do I tell my boss that he can kiss my ass in a polite way?

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Drop your pants, bend over and say "please".

Trying to find a house here in Auckland, the rental market is really competitive. I received approval on one application for a house that would work in the short term but haven't heard back on a couple others that would work better. Do I lock in the first house to be safe or do I hold out hope on the ones I like better?

 

[Ken PE 3.1]

Screw that, just find a fridge box and set up shop on the mayors front lawn with a Trump sticker in plain view.

Sitting in a hotel, intoxicated, in Chicago all alone. Should I find a gentleman's club?

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