Forced to watch
Under the Skin this weekend...
Sooooooo... this movie is about a voluptuous woman who goes around Scotland looking for hopeless looking men, brings them back to her place, and does something with them. I can't explain it, but it's pretty odd. I'll go ahead and skip the rest of the "plot" and "what it is supposed to be about" according to paid critics. According to critics on
Rotton Tomatoes, this is the best thing ever. Real people think it's rubbage and I think their score is waaaayyyy too generous.
This is an artsy flick that moves at a watch-the-grass-grow pace. It's glacial and, at least in my opinion, the movie goes nowhere. No characters are explained, reasoning for the story is absent, and everything is left open ended. The characters are a strange woman doing strange things to strange men and a dude on a motorcycle who keeps track of her (?) for no apparent reason. Coming from someone who enjoys
The Big Lebowski and
Clerks, this is a truly stupid movie. An unfortunate and complete waste of my time. The only positive, for me, about this movie is the fact that Scarlett Johansson gets naked more than once. And it's not like "Ooooh! I see side ****!" No, this is Cinemax territory.
I feel sorry for those who believe this is a fantastic movie of "holy sh*t" proportions. Maybe they weren't raised right or they were bullied in high school even by that one kid who ate his lunches in the bathroom stalls. I shouldn't blame them for their opinion of the movie... but nevertheless, they're wrong. So so wrong. I give the movie a half star. Just one half. And I rounded up.
Scarlett Johansson, however, will get a few more stars than that. For me, maybe it's just that she has lost some of that "je ne sais quoi" since
Lost in Translation, or maybe it's just the movie that taints her, but I can only give her 3.5 stars in this dumpster fire. Hulk still smash.