Great Quotes

[maryannette]

Or, "That's better than what I had in mind for it."

 

[ktulu]

"She's a summer lovin', in spring, fall, and winter..........she can make happy any man alive" ~ Jerry Garcia

 

[Guest]

ODB just got a few more years in purgatory tacked on...

If it counts for anything ... you are still okay in my book Brotha ODB !! lusone: :bananalama: I don't care what the church says about you ....

:Locolaugh: :Locolaugh:

JR

 

[G-Loose]

Back in college, I worked the help desk for a local internet company. We had a famous or should I say infamous customer. I believe she was nuts. She used to ask some of the most off the wall questions such as: "Will my internet still work if I plug my phoneline into a lamp?" I thought well maybe she was hearing impaired and had a light that signaled the phone ringing, but if that was the case how was she able to talk on the phone with me? Each time she called she gave her complete history of her service with us. I already had most of it in front of me in her trouble tickets, including the part where she claims that one of our technicians (Derrick) sent her a virus. She always asked to talk to Derrick and he always declined unless we tricked him by saying it was someone else, hehehe.

Yes those were the good ole days. Here is how one call went:

Customer: "My internet isn't working"

Me: "What's on the screen?"

Customer: "The screen is black"

Me: "Are there any lights on"

Customer: "No, a tree fell on the line and the power is out"

 

[wilheldp_PE]

Here is how one call went:
...

Customer: "No, a tree fell on the line and the power is out"

Wow...that means she had a real land-line phone too. I haven't had one of those in over 5 years. Either that, or she was on a cell phone, which I find unlikely for an old lady.

 

[squishles10]

That, I swear, is my old IT guy. Dumbest shit I have ever met. He realized very early that I knew more than he did so he stayed on my good side so I didn't tell on him.

Anything about the built-in cupholder???

 

[Guest]

Overheard today ....

"Only the mediocre are always at their best." - Jean Giradoux

JR

 

[Guest]

I received this one in an e-mail that contained a spreadsheet of cost estimates for various and sundry work activities ....

Good morning,
As Jethro Bodine would say, “For your ciphering pleasure”. Let me know if you have any questions.

I am still trying to figure this cryptic message out ...

JR

 

[wilheldp_PE]

I am still trying to figure this cryptic message out ...
JR

Not a fan of the Beverly Hillbillies?

 

[G-Loose]

Wow...that means she had a real land-line phone too. I haven't had one of those in over 5 years. Either that, or she was on a cell phone, which I find unlikely for an old lady.

I did say back in college. That was back in '02. She was one of those women that think they know how these new age gadgets work but really has no clue and ends up screwing up them up and blames the IT guy.

Here is another infamous caller. She kept threatening to sue the internet service over a $2,000 phone bill. Her son kept visiting porn sites and one of them replaced the dial-up connection with what we in the internet business called a "porn-dialer". This basically meant instead of dialing a local number her computer was dialing a number that connected her through one of those pay by the minute numbers. In no way was her internet service liable for her son's ignorance but in order to appease her they ended up paying her phone bill and cancelling her internet service.

 

[Jennifer Price]

When I worked at the DOT, we had one guy call me up and said, "I have noticed that the roads that you are putting down are black and do not match the grey roads. Is there anyway for you to change the color of the new stuff to match the existing?"

I had to hit the mute button so he didn't hear me laughing.

 

[csb]

^ We have people who want us to use the "pretty rock" that makes the road red.

 

[FLBuff PE]

^ We have people who want us to use the "pretty rock" that makes the road red.

Did you tell them to drive at dwan or dusk, and look for the wildlife? That makes the roads here in the Colorado mountains red.

 

[Capt Worley PE]

^ We have people who want us to use the "pretty rock" that makes the road red.

First time I saw that was I-24 (I think) in Kentucky back in 1991. Freaked me out. I had to call my dad, who worked in SCDOT at the time and tell him about it.

 

[Guest]

A few thoughts for today ...

"The perfect is the enemy of the good." - Voltaire

"Hocus pocus Dominocus" - Attribution witheld

JR