Corrupt a Wish!

[pbrme]

<<GIZZAMMM>> - - -,

She's all yours. Fortunately for you, amazon has released the complete first season.

...but, after opening up the delivery package your pipi falls off... oops.

I wish I knew if this is a duck or a rabbit.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted!! You're told what it is, but you have developed a case of short term memory loss and forget it within seconds.

I wish the contractor building my patio would just hurry up and finish the project.

 

[Ble_PE]

Granted, but here's the finished product:

I wish I was at the beach with a CAB in my hand.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted!!

Unfortunately, you're at the beach helping with the latest oil spill

I wish I could take a summer vacation as long as the ones my kids have.

 

[Chucktown PE]

^ Granted. But your summer vacation will be here. Siberia. Hope you pack a warm coat.

I wish I could afford a new truck.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted!!

Unfortunately, you will have to fight mini-chuck for the right to use it.

I wish I could take the rest of the day off and spend it with my family.

 

[Chucktown PE]

Granted. Unfortunately they are all puking and have diarrhea and you have to clean it all up.

I wish I could go fishing the rest of the week.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted. You are now the greenhorn on the Kodiak and must tend to the bait station...

I wish everyone on eb.com got 10% pay raises.

 

[Supe]

Granted! They docked Dex's pay to make up the difference.

I wish this iPhone was easier to type on.

 

[Chucktown PE]

Granted. Now your fingers are 1/3 their original size. Your lady friend is less than pleased.. :eyebrows:

I wish I had a sprinkler system.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted. Unfortunately, it only sprinkles on you.

I wish we had better candidates to vote for in November.

 

[Wolverine]

Too easy....

<BLING!> Now it's a four way race with two more good choices:

I wish I had a hottie masseusse to rub out this kink in my neck I got from sleeping wrong

(AND I wish I knew how to spell masseusse with confidence - that's two wishes).

 

[pbrme]

*<Fffmmzzzmmm'ing>* Wish is granted...

The hottest Masseuse in the world shows up and proceeds to warmup on your neck, sending you into a trance. She immediately gets turned on and starts heading down south, but finds your dirty little secret and bolts.

As for you other wish... ask your little pal...

I wish... I wish the grass was mowed, edged, and weedwhacked by the time I get home after work.

 

[envirotex]

Granted. But your new lawnservice accidentally mows the neighbors grass instead.

View attachment 5158

I wish someone would go to the grocery store for me.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted!!

Unfortunately they run up a tap so high you end up with the mafia after to settle it.

I wish I didn't have to go to so many damn meetings.

 

[Master slacker]

Baaa...... ZIIIIINNNGGG!!!!

Granted. You no longer have to, but you read a self-help book as suggested by your boss. Now do you not only "choose" to go to them, but you make required weekly meetings for your working group to teach them how valuable choices are. :wub:

After one of those meetings, your team throws you over a cliff.

I wish Thursday (my Friday this week) would hurry up and get here.

 

[Dexman PE PMP]

Granted!! Unfortunately, your vacation request is revoked Thursday afternoon because you forgot the coversheets on your TPS reports. By the way,

I wish my house was paid off.

 

[Chucktown PE]

Congratulations. Your house is now paid off. To celebrate, you and your family take a vacation. While on vacation your homeowner's insurance was cancelled and lightning struck your house causing a fire, which burnt said house to the ground.



I wish I could get motivated to start running again.

 

[engineergurl]

too easy, granted....

but you are running away from ZOMBIES (sorry had to go there)... and since you never found the motivation before this, they catch you and eat your brains...

I wish that I wasn't constantly using my vacation time to run errands...

 

[Supe]

Granted!

They took away your vacation time, and you now have to run your errands during unpaid time off.

I wish the assholes at our project in Virginia would do their work right the first time.