Talking to boss

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Ble_PE

I need a beer.
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As many of you already know, I've been offered a job for a company in FL. I'm considering the offer right now, but I'm honestly leaning toward turning it down for a variety of reasons which I won't get into here. I was curious if anyone thinks it's a good idea to sit down with my current boss to discuss things before I make the final decision? I know that he would not hold anything against me for looking for a new job considering the work situation here the past 6 months, but I was wondering if anything good could come of it. The main thing I want to discuss is the security of our office here and the possibility of raises/promotions next year. If I'm given a promotion (which I deserve) the raise would make this salary pretty much equal to the salary for the job in FL.

I'm not sure if it is worth it to bring this up or if I should just let it go. Mrs. Ble thinks I should talk to him, but I thought I would see if anyone here has had any experience with this kind of situation? Thanks!

 
As many of you already know, I've been offered a job for a company in FL. I'm considering the offer right now, but I'm honestly leaning toward turning it down for a variety of reasons which I won't get into here. I was curious if anyone thinks it's a good idea to sit down with my current boss to discuss things before I make the final decision? I know that he would not hold anything against me for looking for a new job considering the work situation here the past 6 months, but I was wondering if anything good could come of it. The main thing I want to discuss is the security of our office here and the possibility of raises/promotions next year. If I'm given a promotion (which I deserve) the raise would make this salary pretty much equal to the salary for the job in FL.
I'm not sure if it is worth it to bring this up or if I should just let it go. Mrs. Ble thinks I should talk to him, but I thought I would see if anyone here has had any experience with this kind of situation? Thanks!
I have four words "get it in writing". Don't make a decision based on verbal promises of pay increases and/or promotions.

 
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If you have a good relationship with your boss then I would talk to him / her.

I have done so in the past, but that was when the economy was good and we were in a higher demand.

 
Also, if you conversation starts along the lines of "I received a job offer for $xxxxxx and wanted to talk with you about it", you have to be prepared to leave. From what it sounds like, you have a good relationship with your boss, so it probably is a low possibility, but I know folks (granted my industry is different than most) who have started conversations that way one morning and ended up packing their things that afternoon.

 
Yea, I definitely have a good relationship with him so I'm not too worried about him asking me to leave. He's made a point to tell everyone in the CSA dept here that he doesn't want anyone leaving. He's actually told me a few times when I've asked for time off that I could have it as long as I wasn't interviewing somewhere, so I think he wants to keep me around.

I honestly love where I work and who I work with so I feel like I would owe it to myself and him to at least talk to him about it. Like I said, I'm leaning toward staying anyway, but I still haven't made up my mind.

 
I'd say talk to him. The absolute worst case scenario is that you have to end up taking the job in Florida. The best case scenario is that it fast-tracks your promotion/raise at your current job so that you get the benefits of the Florida job without having to relocate.

 
You could talk with the guy but I agree with MA, only make decisions with stuff you have in writing.

Business is business.

 
I would advise caution. If your current boss thinks your hanging a job offer over him to try and force a raise out of him, it may come back to bite you. I dont think it would hurt to go and see what he has to say, but beware the possible backlash.

 
Get it in writing, but don't use it as a bargaining chip. You must decide before talking to your boss, and only do so if you've decided to take the job in FL. Let your boss decide whether he wants to negotiate your current terms. That would be more respectful and professional than to discuss your uncertainties of what you should do. In the end, you want what's best for you and your current boss will respect that and be happy for you even if he'll be saddened by your decision.

You're looking for the right decision with the least amount of regret and risk. Unfortunately, we don't have crystal balls to guide us with these types of decisions. Ask yourself what's more important: a company with limited promotional opportunities, but has a good working culture and where you have established yourself as valuable, or a new employer where you may find better promotional opportunities, but will need to build your reputation and value from the ground up, and the risks associated with it? It's a personal choice, no matter how much your current or potential employers would want you.

I've been in your shoes and I've always chosen to move forward with new opportunities. Each decision and experience ends up being a step further to what you're looking for.

 
Always a slippery slope with these types of discussions. just follow the advise here, and be conscious of the negatives that can arise from such a discussion, and be ready to diffuse them quickly.

I say have the talk.

 
I'm leaning toward having the talk right now. I'm waiting to hear back from some questions that I posed to the offering company before I do so. I'm fairly confident that my boss won't take it too negatively, but that's a risk that I will have to take. It's like wil said, worse case scenario I have to take the FL job and best case scenario is getting a hefty raise/promotion to stay here. We'll see what happens...

 
I'm leaning toward having the talk right now. I'm waiting to hear back from some questions that I posed to the offering company before I do so. I'm fairly confident that my boss won't take it too negatively, but that's a risk that I will have to take. It's like wil said, worse case scenario I have to take the FL job and best case scenario is getting a hefty raise/promotion to stay here. We'll see what happens...
So why did you apply for the job in Florida in the first place? Obviously the job interested you and you did consider leaving your current job when you applied. I'm not confident that you know what you want, and your boss is going to sense that too. It sounds like you have a sure thing where you are, so I'd advise not to rock the boat unless you know for certain that you will take the job in Florida. Keep it professional and don't get all touchy-feely about it.

 
It depends on the relationship, but if you think the relationship is strong go for it. Also - make sure you frame it in the right way, don't demand they meet the offer. I would say something along the lines that a great opportunity was presented to you and it made you do an evaluation of your current situation. Say you have some concerns about development/opportunties/professional growth, etc and want to get a better understanding on were things stand at the company and how you fit in long term.

As I mentioned before - I was in a similar situation earlier this year. Had the economy been better at the time and we were as busy then as we are now, I definitely would have sat down with my boss.

 
I'm leaning toward having the talk right now. I'm waiting to hear back from some questions that I posed to the offering company before I do so. I'm fairly confident that my boss won't take it too negatively, but that's a risk that I will have to take. It's like wil said, worse case scenario I have to take the FL job and best case scenario is getting a hefty raise/promotion to stay here. We'll see what happens...
or a third option... he convinces you to stay, assuring you that it will get better, and suggesting that you're next in line for a promotion. So you turn down the FL job, but your current boss knows you've been looking around and wonders if you're really a team player.

Having this conversation is going to change your relationship. I guess I agree with sac - if you're going to stay, then stay without the conversation so you're still on good terms. If you're going to go, then tell him and only stay if he can counter-offer something substantial.

 
^Here's another person who agrees with that line of thinking. Bringing this up will forever change your relationship with your boss, unless he is the one-in-a-thousand bosses who genuinely is understanding.

I did this myself about 3 years back - I had a great offer but I didn't really want to leave, so I went to my boss, and he verbally promised me that he would fight to get me a long-delayed raise, and that I should tell the offeror to "go to hell", so I did. And here I am, three years later, with no raise and a terrible relationship with my boss, and attempting desperately to leave.

 
These are all great points, scenarios, ideas, and life experiences to help Ble with his diliemna.

IMO, this is what EB.com is all about. :D

 
These are all great points, scenarios, ideas, and life experiences to help Ble with his diliemna.
IMO, this is what EB.com is all about. :D
I agree, thanks everyone for all of your comments. I was a little hesitant to ask this in the first place, but I am very glad that I did. I still haven't made up my mind yet, but I will be sure to keep ya'll updated.

Thanks again!! :thankyou:

 
^Here's another person who agrees with that line of thinking. Bringing this up will forever change your relationship with your boss, unless he is the one-in-a-thousand bosses who genuinely is understanding.
I did this myself about 3 years back - I had a great offer but I didn't really want to leave, so I went to my boss, and he verbally promised me that he would fight to get me a long-delayed raise, and that I should tell the offeror to "go to hell", so I did. And here I am, three years later, with no raise and a terrible relationship with my boss, and attempting desperately to leave.
I was very good friends with my old supervisor. I asked for a 10% increase, and he said he could only get me 6%. So I started interviewing. I got an offer (lower than what I asked for, but more than what I was making). I went into my boss' office to let him know that I had an offer, and was seriously considering taking it. I told him the figure I asked for, but did not go into any more detail. He said, "let me make a few phone calls." He actually got me what I was asking for. All in all, it translated into a 25% increase. Yes, ladies and gents, it can be done...but don't think about friendship...business is business. I kept it short and sweet, he knew what he was paying me, what I wanted, and that I could get it elsewhere, and demonstrated that I was serious about doing so. My raise was IMMEDIATE...showed up in my next paycheck.

The funny part is the firm I turned down ended up calling me back a week later and counter-offering. I had to say no again because I wasn't trying to play games.

Know your worth! And go for it...

 
POed Mommy,

I have a similar story. I had an offer once, and told my company that it was nothing negative about them, just had a good offer (was truth) they didn't quite match it, but came close enough that I wanted to stay with a place that I was comfortable and embedded.

It worked out great, however, about a year and a half later, another consulting firm made me an offer TOO good to refuse, so I ended up leaving and taking it.

Both times, the job offers came about because I had friends in the other company.

Bottom line is:

I've had that talk once, and it worked out, and there was never any hard feelings. I also know people who went to have that talk and were told to clean out their crap by the end of the day. But I think they expected it. If you know your boss well enough, you should know what to expect.

 
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