I took the T&F exam this past April and passed first time. I think the most helpful item for me was creating a note book (3-ring binder) that was categorized by topic (fluids, heat transfer, statics, etc.). Each topic contained very basic notes and the most common equations. The plan was that this would be my immediate go-to while taking the exam. The notebook also contained info about where to look for references in the MERM, such as "see table 14-2 for blah blah blah...". I used this notebook when working problems and taking practice exams. This helped me to decide what goes in and what stays out. There's no point in ultimately copying an 800-page reference manual. I tried to weed out items by the 80/20 rule.
This really worked out well for me. During the exam, I just identified what kind of problem it was and then went to that section in my binder. Most of the time, what I needed was there. If not, I had notes that pointed me to specific sections in the MERM or sometimes one of my other references. During the exam, I basically only opened the MERM to look up tables and properties. I wasn't using it to find equations or decide how to solve a problem. I should also mention that I also included little hints such as, "don't forget to use absolute pressure in this equation" or "be sure to convert to Kelvin", etc.
I used both the Lindburg and the NCEES practice exams. I think the actual exam was very similar to the NCEES practice exam. Looking back, I wish I had taken the Lindburg exam a little earlier in my study (I think I did it about a month or 3 weeks out). Don't worry about time with the Lindburg exam, it is a little more difficult. Just work through and make sure you understand the problems. I would also recommend going through the exam a second time. Sure, you'll recognize some of the problems but it is still good practice to work them again. I figure between the two exams that is 160 problems so I wasn't worried about not being challenged during the second time.
I graduated university in 1997 so I've been out of school for a while. Don't let that hold you back. With some determination and effort, you will definitely be able to pass. Good luck!