If you had to...

[Sapper PE LS]

Jolt Cola!

Sleep in or get to bed early?

 

[Supe]

Sleep in. Can't miss all the football games/late night TV favorites.

Cold toilet public seat, or warm public toilet seat?

 

[Dleg]

^Cold. Can't get past the mental block on the warm one, no matter how clean it may appear.

Let's move into the Star Wars universe for a while:

You're a young, unemployed (but free) human living on Tatooine, bored out of your skull. You really have only two options: join the Empire as an enlisted storm trooper, or take your chances in the Mos Eisley job market? (for example: selling pod racing tickets, mopping up alien blood at the local bar, cleaning Jabba's Palace, etc.)

 

[Supe]

Mos Eisley. I'd easily entertain the thought of being a professional grifter. Sure, lasers are cool and all, but no chicks? No thanks.

Eat moldy bread, or eat moldy cheese (and not cheese that is deliberately moldy)?

 

[Dleg]

^Cheese. You can scrape the moldy parts off either, but pound-for-pound, you'll survive longer on the cheese.

Sex slave to Jaba the Hutt, or sex slave to a Wookie?

 

[Sapper PE LS]

Wookie, they've got that lumber jack vibe going as opposed to the creepy fat couch potato thing.

Is dleg disturbed by the questions he asks in this thread or just creative?

 

[Dleg]

Is that an official "if you had to?" question?

Frankly, the last question disturbed me - both options make my skin crawl. But wasn't that the spirit of this game?

If you had to, would you rather be the guy sent to disconnect the power at Darth Vader's house for failure to pay his bills, or the Emperor's? Both are home, and must "buzz you in" for you to perform the disconnection.

 

[Sapper PE LS]

Vader, I feel like I've at least got a chance because at one point he actually wasn't an evil person. And yes that is the spirit of the game and no it wasn't a legal question, but damn dude that question was disturbing and I had to make some comment about it, hope you know I was joking.

Would you rather tell Sauron that his glaring creepy eye mountain is disturbing his neighbors and the HOA must levy a fine on him or go trick or treating at the home of each Ring Wraith while wearing the ring?

 

[Dleg]

Hmmm.... tough one. Probably Sauron. Just slightly less creepy than the ring wraiths, plus there might be a possibility of surviving, if I agreed to turn evil. The very first ring wraith would likely just lop my head off.

Speaking of, would you rather be electrocuted to death by the Emperor's lightning bolts, or agree to do his bidding, under the new name of Darth (insert your name) with yellow pupils.

 

[Sapper PE LS]

It would totally rock to be Darth Sapper!

Trudge along middle earth with the hobbits or the elves?

 

[Dleg]

Being a Hobbit springs to mind as my first choice. I appreciate the humility, as well as the beer (and probably the pipe-weed, assuming being a Hobbit means I am no longer subject to random drug testing). Although the kick-assedness of being an Elf might make up for the egotism and constant, cold flourescent lighting - just the archery skills, alone, might be worth it. Plus, Elf chicks are waaaay hotter (and cleaner) than Hobbit chicks (blech), and I bet they fool around all the time, otherwise being eternal would be unbearable. So I guess I would probably choose being an Elf, but there would be a lot of self-loathing.

You know, some of these questions are worthy of debate threads, on their own.

Be Indiana Jones, or Han Solo?

 

[Sapper PE LS]

Indie, hands down. My all time favorite movies growing up were the Indiana jones movies. I used to borrow my aunts bull whip and practice with it for hours.

Would you rather be assimilated into the Borg or an Orc horde?

 

[Dleg]

The Borg. At least they work together: "Brother, could you spare a 01100010100101010001111?" Orcs would just as soon eat you. Orcs are just in it for themselves.

Would you rather be partying in a cramped Hobbit House with 13 dirty, farting dwarves, or sitting around an ornate table in Rivendell (?), eating salad with a bunch of stuck-up Elves?

 

[Supe]

Rivendell. You could always sneak off and get it on with some elf hottie in a luxurious bathroom somewhere. Dirty farting dwarf women don't do it for me.

Would you rather give a public speech about why Obamacare is a great success, or a speech about how Miley Cyrus should be taken seriously as a musician?

 

[Sapper PE LS]

Miley Cyrus, because people aren't willing to start a revolution about her.

If you had $1mil in the bank but were told you can't spend any of it on yourself, not even the interest and had to choose between contributing it to a charity that aligns with your moral belief structure but has some history of corruption or contribute to a totally legit and above board charity that doesn't align with your core beliefs, who would get the money?

 

[Supe]

The first one. Why the heck would I contribute to a cause I disagree with?

Take a smoking hot hooker to prom for $20, or take an ugly girl for free?

 

[Sapper PE LS]

Hooker, cuz it's a sure thing at the after party... And the intent of my question was that even if you disagreed with the mission of the charity, you would know that the money was doing people good and not lining the pockets of people who were pretending to do good.

Would you rather sleep in the cold with just your boxers and tee shirt or in a hot room wearing a sweats and stocking cap.. And you can't put more on / take anything off.

 

[Supe]

Cold. That's how I sleep all the time anyways.

Bad tasting regular coffee, or great tasting decaf?

 

[Dleg]

^The sludge. I am an addict.

You are sentenced to 10 years in prison, and you are given a choice of cellmates: a small, skinny guy with glasses who you are told serially raped and murdered 37 white men in their sleep, or a giant, muscular black guy who you are told murdered 37 white guys by hand in a violent, race-driven rampage.

(for the purpose of this question, you are a soft, 30-something white man who has never done any hard time)

 

[Sapper PE LS]

I'll take skinny dude because I'd rather be asleep when I get murdered.

Oops, forgot to pose a question...

Would you rather be eaten by the big bad wolf a la red riding hoods granny or by the witch in the gingerbread house a la hansel and Gretel?