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I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...

 
My objective? Well I object to taking a girl out, you know, and buying her dinner and then she won't put out for you.

 
Your "best"! Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and f* the prom queen.

 
I got this rat, this gnawing, cheese eating fuckin' rat and it brings up questions... You know, see, Bill, like you're the new guy. Girlfriend... Why don't you stay in the bar that night I got your numbers. Social Security numbers. Everybody's fuckin' numbers.

 
Jack, I spent an hour last night in my bedroom talking to Fiorello LaGuardia and he's been dead for forty years. Now where are the d@mn Ghostbusters?

 
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Ladies and gentlemen, this tall drink of water headed my way is a pillar of the shopping community who informed me earlier today of a nefarious plan of his to screw my girlfriend in an extremely uncomfortable place.

 
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