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BTW, you can legitimately buy this on Amazon.  The product questions and reviews are top notch.  Such gems include:

This sux. I put this in the mailbox of my neighbor hoping it would end her and her bloodline. Little to no avail, it didn't work. So now I'm 40 dollars lighter and she has three tits.
Great Product, Poor Packaging I purchased this product 4.47 Billion Years ago and when I opened it today, it was half empty.
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