How to explain study schedule to child

[TXengrChickPE]

So, I started studying in earnest a few days ago and already, my 6yr old daughter is already starting to complain about my study schedule. Basically, what I've been doing is family stuff (dinner, playtime, etc) until 8pm. At 8pm, I start studying and my daughter gets 1/2hr to play computer games while hubby does dishes (he is being wonderful). At 8:30, hubby gets her ready for bed and I take a quick break at 9 to read her bedtime story. Then I keep studying til 11 or 12.

This will be my first (and hopefully ONLY) time taking the exam, so I have no idea how much study time I actually need. I barely studied at all for my EIT (dd was only 4mo. old then) and passed on the first try, but I'm a lot more worried about the PE, and I feel like I've forgotten a LOT.

We have tried to keep her schedule as close to normal as possible, except that now daddy does the before bed routine instead of me. But, she has thrown a tantrum 2 nights running now about how she needs me to give her a bath. We didn't give in, but I didn't get much studying done while she was screaming. Up until now, we've been pretty lucky with her behavior and have rarely had to deal with tantrums, which means we don't have much practice

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to explain to her how important this is? I've already told her that Saturday's are going to be fun days where she gets to pick something that all of us (or just the 2 of us) do together, but that doesn't seem to be enough to get her through the week.

 

[DVINNY]

I'm sure that it bothers you as much as it does her, or more so.

I have two kids, and I took this freakin' test 4 times. Of course I didn't deprive them the first two times by studying, but by the last time, I figured it was better to do it now, then spend that time all over again in six months.

Do it right once. Kids will appreciate it someday. Don't let the guilt build up, you're doing for them too.

 

[Guest]

There are many adults that have a hard time understanding the level of dedication it takes to take this exam much less having to look at it from a child's perspective. You may need to allow for some moderation in your exam schedule for 'play' time during the week as well. In reality, that might not be such a bad idea - most people cannot focus/retain information beyond 3-hrs of focused effort. If you stagger your study time during the week and also allow for some study time on the weekend you can still achieve the same outcome while maintaining some harmony in the house - that will be important for YOUR focus.

One other thought - once it gets closer to exam day, you are going to want to drill-down and put in some concentrated exam-prep study time. You and your husband might need to plan activities during your 'intense' study periods leading up to exam day for your daughter. A little guilt today will be easily rememedied down the road - there won't be any long-term issues

Best of luck!

JR

 

[Techie_Junkie_PE_LEED_AP]

Tough one. First off, I think it would be nearly impossible for any 6 year old to comprehend the scope of what this encompasses. Most of the adults in my family didn't even understand.

I found that basically only other Engineers (or others who have taken Professional exams) will understand, unless they know some who has taken it, seen how much they studied, and failed.

Maybe try breaking it up where you put her to bed twice a week, and the other three nights, you go to a library or somewhere quiet to study (maybe at work if you can stay in the building) from after work until 11 or 12.

Just do what you have to do so that when November comes, you have all the time to spend with her you want!

 

[maryannette]

I took the EIT twice when my 2 daughters were very young. Then I took the PE 3 times when they were still young. The only way I could get any decent study time was to be somewhere else. Mostly when I was studying good (I wasn't always studying good) I would leave work and go to the library at the community college. It was very quiet at night and conducive to studying. My husband was also very supportive. He did the dinner, homework, etc. I would get home about 8:30 and spend a little time with them before bed. That was 3 nights a week, then I tried to study some on the weekends. It is very hard. I passed the PE in April. My daughters are in high school and college now, so it's a lot easier. Find a place to study where you won't hear screaming. And she may not scream if you are not home. Make every minute count. Last winter when I was studying a lot and not sleeping enough, I would go to my car in the parking lot at work and take a 45 minute nap at lunchtime. Good luck. I'll be around if you need encouragement. By the way, your daughter will realize what this means some day and be very proud of you.

 

[TXengrChickPE]

thanks everybody for the suggestions, and congrats maryannette! Tonight went a LOT better... she was pretty tired because she had a field trip at daycare and gymnastics this evening. Maybe that's the secret, get her so tired by 8:30 that she won't care who gives her a bath

 

[maryannette]

Glad it went better.

 

[rudy]

Hi TXengrChick, I feel for you. I have 3 kids. It's tough going thru all the studying with little ones. This is my third time taking the test. My youngest was 6 last year when I first took the test. My study schedule included: arriving an hour early before work to study, studying one hour during lunch, half an hour while the kids did homework (they were to hold off any questions during that half hour and try to figure it out; after that half hour, I would help them), one hour after work at least three times a week while I waited for my kids during their tae kwan do class, during the week a few hours after the kids went to bed, a few hours on Saturday and Sunday mornings before the kids woke up (I would go to bed early in order to wake up early), about 3 full days to take practice exams (spread out by a few weeks).

My co-worker took the test once and passed it. She had a similar study schedule, but she would study in the mornings at home, come in to work late, and leave late. She also faced the same issues about her 3-year old wanting more play time. Her answer was daddy taking the time to play dollies.

Issues are opportunities. Perhaps, now is a good time for your 6-year old to learn how take showers, instead of baths. This will give her a sense of pride of doing more grown up stuff, and will free up your time and maybe reduce tantrums.

There's also consequences. When my kids try to argue about such things like why should I take a shower, my response is, "We can use this time to discuss it, but it is going to cut into your playing time." Needless to say, they quickly figure out they can play longer if they take a shower instead of trying to get out of it. Perhaps, you and your daughter can talk about the consequences for tantrums -- maybe each minute she throws a tantrum is a minute reduced from computer time.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[bigray76]

Txengrchick,

When I started studying for the exam, my son was 18 months. My wife is pursuing her doctorate and I decided it was time to go for my PE. I had originally applied to take the October 2006 exam, which the state of NJ then gave me two dates I was eligible for (Oct '06 and Apr '07). My wife found out in July '06 that she would be taking her Qualifying Exam over the weekend that I would be taking the October exam - and she didn't have a choice on dates. I opted to take the April exam so she could study and prepare for her test and we wouldn't need to platoon time.

What I started to do then was to spend more time preparing my discipline specific binders and collect my references. Once she had completed her exam, I started to study more. I did a fair amount at work - like others have said, getting in a little early, staying a little late, closing my door and doing an hour or so over lunch. I do have a work issued laptop which I used to organize my notes for my binders and kept me organized as I started to print and put my notes together.

The last few months (January - March) found me taking just about every Friday off from work to get one really good day of working in (also allowed me to take some practice exams since I had that 4 hour block of time to devote to it). It was toughest for me at night when my son (then closer to 2) wanted nothing other than to play with daddy. Squeezing that extra hour or two of studying in at work really allowed me to take some well deserved breaks (evenings where I devoted to my family and not the books) and helped to break up subjects so that I didn't feel like I was burning out after trying to put in 2-4 hours one night after a 12 hour day at work.

One day, when all of our kids are older, I think they will understand, appreciate, and admire what we have accomplished.

My motto for the exam was: Do it once, do it right, and never do it again.

Good luck and let us know if we can help you in any way.

-Ray

 

[ALBin517]

So, I started studying in earnest a few days ago and already, my 6yr old daughter is already starting to complain about my study schedule. Basically, what I've been doing is family stuff (dinner, playtime, etc) until 8pm. At 8pm, I start studying and my daughter gets 1/2hr to play computer games while hubby does dishes (he is being wonderful). At 8:30, hubby gets her ready for bed and I take a quick break at 9 to read her bedtime story. Then I keep studying til 11 or 12.
This will be my first (and hopefully ONLY) time taking the exam, so I have no idea how much study time I actually need. I barely studied at all for my EIT (dd was only 4mo. old then) and passed on the first try, but I'm a lot more worried about the PE, and I feel like I've forgotten a LOT.

We have tried to keep her schedule as close to normal as possible, except that now daddy does the before bed routine instead of me. But, she has thrown a tantrum 2 nights running now about how she needs me to give her a bath. We didn't give in, but I didn't get much studying done while she was screaming. Up until now, we've been pretty lucky with her behavior and have rarely had to deal with tantrums, which means we don't have much practice

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to explain to her how important this is? I've already told her that Saturday's are going to be fun days where she gets to pick something that all of us (or just the 2 of us) do together, but that doesn't seem to be enough to get her through the week.

That's why we didn't let women take the exam in my day.

Sincerely,

Grumpy Old Man

 

[VA_Env_Engr]

My daughter was 2 years old when I started studying for the exam and my wife was going to school as well. It was really tough, but as mentioned previously, I was determined to put in as much effort as required the first time and get it over with. A lot of credit go to my wife and kid for me passing the exam on first try. :appl:

I usually put in 2-3 hours per day on week days, even though I could not completely get away, so I would talk to my kid and study. On weekends, my wife would keep her busy for a few hours and I was able to put in some focussed effort. As the exam day approached, I started going to the library on weekdays and a few hours on the weekends to practice the exams and study.

Good luck.

 

[TXengrChickPE]

That's why we didn't let women take the exam in my day.
Sincerely,

Grumpy Old Man

Yeah, that's helpful :joke:

 

[maryannette]

That's why we didn't let women take the exam in my day.
Sincerely,

Grumpy Old Man

I don't know what day that was, but i'm glad is gone. :multiplespotting:

 

[rudy]

Hi AlBin517, that explains why the board just recently approved you to take it.

 

[MA_PE]

TX:

You need to get away from the house and all these distractions to get any real studying in. Go to a single friend's house, the library, a local cafe, i.e. anywhere where you can focus on the task at hand.

Hubby and dd will be just fine. It's a stressful thing and you're going to feel like you're neglecting somone/something. Heck, you are!

but you're only human and can't do it all.

Get the job done, pass the test and then get back into the old routine. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Think of it as the same as if you had a second job and you had to go to work. Hubby and dd would be left to fend for themselves. They will survive.

FWIW, I met with some other guys at the office on Saturdays (once a week) and we put in 4-5 hours for 12 weeks prior to the exam. Also we individually worked problems for a couple of hours at our own schedules during the week.

It worked and we all passed STR1.

good luck

 

[grover]

I thought the actual exam was a vacation- an actual full day away from the kids, to myself, relatively stress-free!! Was GREAT

 

[EdinNO]

I had a 3 year old and one year old and one right around the corner when I was studying. Fortunately, the 1 year old went to bed at about 7pm each night and the 3 year old didn't throw a fit when I didn't play with her. I typically tried to start studying around 8, 9 or 10, whichever worked best (not an exact schedule) and my wife usually put the 3yo to bed. Sometimes I did it instead.

I probably put in a good 3 to 4 months and maybe 250 hours. I studied in the venenings as much as possible, during lunch breaks and sometimes on weekends. Basically, I decided which chapters to study in my MERM book and laid out a schedule to read and work almost all in-chapter and end-of-chapter exercises in each. In addition, I worked through the NCEES sample book a couple times. It was grueling and I hated it, but peaceful at times. Looking back, like everything else, time heals all wounds. It doesn's seem as bad now.

Just put in the time!

Ed

 

[Undertaker]

So, I started studying in earnest a few days ago and already, my 6yr old daughter is already starting to complain about my study schedule. Basically, what I've been doing is family stuff (dinner, playtime, etc) until 8pm. At 8pm, I start studying and my daughter gets 1/2hr to play computer games while hubby does dishes (he is being wonderful). At 8:30, hubby gets her ready for bed and I take a quick break at 9 to read her bedtime story. Then I keep studying til 11 or 12.
This will be my first (and hopefully ONLY) time taking the exam, so I have no idea how much study time I actually need. I barely studied at all for my EIT (dd was only 4mo. old then) and passed on the first try, but I'm a lot more worried about the PE, and I feel like I've forgotten a LOT.

We have tried to keep her schedule as close to normal as possible, except that now daddy does the before bed routine instead of me. But, she has thrown a tantrum 2 nights running now about how she needs me to give her a bath. We didn't give in, but I didn't get much studying done while she was screaming. Up until now, we've been pretty lucky with her behavior and have rarely had to deal with tantrums, which means we don't have much practice

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to explain to her how important this is? I've already told her that Saturday's are going to be fun days where she gets to pick something that all of us (or just the 2 of us) do together, but that doesn't seem to be enough to get her through the week.

My respects. You are trully an extraordinary woman and about the hubby, hold him tight. Don't let him go. There are no too many willing to do what he is doing out here. The best of luck for you.

 

[Freon]

I did most of my studying after work in the office. I would step out to eat, then come back to my desk and grind thru a chapter in the EERM a couple times a week. Just don't be afaid of taking a day off you study schedule, you'll need to for you own sanity.

Freon

 

[royal flush]

Great thread, engrchick! I think that being away from your young 'uns to get studying done is actually harder for mom than it is for the kids...

My daughter was 1.5 when I took the EIT, and she was 5 (and I also had a a 2 year old) by the time I took the PE. My 5 year old really caught on to the studying thing, since she was in kindergarten. In fact, I think it made her feel better to see that mama had homework to do, too-- it helped motivate her to get hers done.

In general, I left the house to study. My husband was pretty good at studying at home (he passed about a year before me), but the kids never seemed to need as much attention from him as they do from me... anyways, having someone like grandma or dad to watch the kids is absolutely required. If I can do it, you can do it! Don't give up!!! There were definitely days when the maternal guilt was pretty overwhelming, but looking back I am SOOO glad I stuck it out...

Oh yeh, and now I'm expecting #3... yep, got my passing PE results last january, and I have a baby due in October!