Schoolyard songs

[Capt Worley PE]

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord

He was cruisin' down the alley in a pink and yellow Ford.

One hand was on the throttle, and the other on a bottle of

Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer!

Glory, Glory, what's it to ya?

Glory, Glory, what's it to ya?

Oh my President has a first name

it's j-i-m-m-y

oh my President has a second name

it's c-a-r-t-e-r

I like to curse him everyday

and if you ask me why I'll say

'cuz jimmy carter has a way

of ****** up the USA

Comet, it makes your mouth turn green

Comet, it tastes like Listerine,

Comet, it makes you vomit,

So buy some Comet and vomit today.

When you're driving down the road

and you gotta drop a load

Diarrhea, diarrhea!

When you're driving in your chevy

and you feel something heavy

Diarrhea, diarrhea!

Some people think it's funny

but it's really hot and runny

Diarrhea, diarrhea!

There's no pain, there's no strain,

just sit back and let it drain

 

[benbo]

Not a song, but notable bathroom stall grafitti from middle school-

"Flush twice. It's a long way to the cafeteria."

 

[Supe]

Not a song, but notable bathroom stall grafitti from middle school-
"Flush twice. It's a long way to the cafeteria."

Along those lines, "Here I sit, broken hearted. Came to poop but only farted."

 

[snickerd3]

Miss Mary Mac, Mac, Mac

All dressed in black, black, black.

With silver buttons, buttons, buttons

All down her back, back, back.

She asked her mother, mother, mother

For 50 cents, cents, cents.

To see the elephants, elephants, elephants

Jump over the fence, fence, fence.

They jumped so high, high, high

They reached the sky, sky, sky

They never came back, back, back

Till the 4th of July, July, July.

 

[neabob]

On top of ol' Smoky, all covered with cheese

I lost my poor meatball when somebody sneezed

It rolled off the table and onto the floor

And then my poor meatball rolled right out the door

 

[Sschell]

there once was a dude from Nantucket...

 

[snickerd3]

There are hand movements to go with the song.

Pizza Hut, Pizza Hut

Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Pizza Hut

Mc Donalds, Mc Donalds

Burger King, Wendy's and Taco bell

 

[MA_PE]

On top of ol' Smoky, all covered with cheeseI lost my poor meatball when somebody sneezed

It rolled off the table and onto the floor

And then my poor meatball rolled right out the door

It rolled in a garden

and under a bush

and then my poor meatball

was nothing but mush

Oh the mush was as tasty

as tasty could be

and early next summer

it grew into a tree

The tree was all covered

with beautiful moss

it grew lovely meatballs

and tomato sauce.

 

[MA_PE]

Eddie Spaghetti

with the meatball eyes

put him in the oven

and you get french fries

 

[EM_PS]

Glory glory Hallelujah

teacher hit me with a ruler

I stood behind the door with a loaded 44

and teacher don't teach no more

 

[Road Guy]

Boys go to college to get more knowledge

Girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider

 

[Capt Worley PE]

My mommy makes counterfeit whiskey

my daddy makes counterfeit gin

my sister makes love for ten dollars

my god how the money rolls in!

 

[Capt Worley PE]

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to have a little fun,

Stupid Jill forgot the pill,

and now they have a son.

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to fetch a pail of water

Jack got horny, Jill got corny

and now they have a daughter.

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to smoke some marijuana

Jack got high, unzipped his fly

and Jill said "Ooh, I wanna."

 

[EM_PS]

Susie had a steamboat

the steamboat had a bell

susie went to heaven

the steamboat went to

Hello operator

please get me #9

and if you disconnect me

i'll kick you right

Behind the fridgerator

there was a piece of glass

when susie fell upon it

she almost broke her

Ask me no more questions

I'll tell you no more lies

da da da da...i forget the rest

 

[snickerd3]

Susie had a steamboatthe steamboat had a bell

susie went to heaven

the steamboat went to

Hello operator

please get me #9

and if you disconnect me

i'll kick you right

Behind the fridgerator

there was a piece of glass

when susie fell upon it

she almost broke her

Ask me no more questions

I'll tell you no more lies

da da da da...i forget the rest

the boys are in the bathroom

zipping up their flys

are in the city

and bees are in the park

susie and her boyfriend

are kissing in the dark

is like a movie

a movies like a show

a show is like a tv set

and that is all I know

 

[Capt Worley PE]

Boys go to college to get more knowledgeGirls go to Jupiter to get more stupider

I learned it:

Boys go to Mars to get some candy bars

Girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider

 

[snickerd3]

The Princess Pat,

Lived in a tree,

She sailed across,

The seven seas,

She sailed across,

The Channel Two,

And she took with her,

A Rigabamboo.

A Rigabamboo,

Now what is that?

It's something made,

By the Princess Pat,

It's red and gold,

And purple too,

Thats why it's called,

A Rigabamboo.

Now Captain Jack,

Had a mighty fine crew,

He sailed across,

The Channel Two,

But his ship sank,

And yours will too,

If you don't take,

A Rigabamboo.

A Rigabamboo,

Now what is that?

It's something made,

By the Princess Pat,

It's red and gold,

And purple too,

Thats why it's called,

A Rigabamboo.

 

[TouchDown]

Great green globs of

mutilated monkey meat

something something something something

grab a fork and let us eat...

 

[TouchDown]

Great green globs of mutilated monkey meat

something something something something

grab a fork and let us eat...

Had to look it up...

Great green globs of greasy, grimy gopher guts

Mutilated monkey feet

Chopped up baby parakeet

Great green globs of greasy, grimy gopher guts

And me without my spoon

 

[snickerd3]

Great green globs of mutilated monkey meat

something something something something

grab a fork and let us eat...

Had to look it up...

Great green globs of greasy, grimy gopher guts

Mutilated monkey feet

Chopped up baby parakeet

Great green globs of greasy, grimy gopher guts

And me without my spoon

how appepitizing