I Hate Facking Pikeys:
Crazy story from last night. We were handing out candy as we're watching a movie on the couch. A couple friends show up w/ their young'n we shoot a shot and the breeze, then another couple show and we do the same. The front porch light was out, so we had our big front window shades drawn and the front door open/glass-screen door exposed so kids could see we were open for bisness. While sitting in the living room, we notice an adult sized kid in a creepy Hostel style costume (blood covered green doctor's getup with a mask & guts hanging out... etc.), standing outside the glass door just staring at us. I say "hey there's a trickertreater" and my wife turns to walk over to the door... notices this creeper staring and then it pushes the doorbell. Wife cracks the door, says the canned "who are you supposed to be" as she extends the candy bowl. Creeper Hostel puts a handful of candy into our bowl and takes a different handful and walks off. Wife turns back to us with a disturbing look. Says "that's weird" and retells the events, but adds "he didn't even say thank you".
I go into defense mode, and ask for the candy bowl. Sure shit there's a handful of body-part gummies or something in there we obviously didn't buy. I inspect the packaging for tears/holes/ect. imediately expecting this guy to have dumped off poison candy or LSD gummies or something for redistribution. So instead of risking anything I just threw them away. Another 10 minutes go by and the Hostel creeper shows back up but this time with two other smaller trickertreaters. Pretty much does the same thing but this time drops off a 1.5L bottle of barefoot. At this point we're all scratching our heads, and figure we must know this person. 10 mins. go by again and He shows back up with another bottle of wine so wife invites creeper in. We're all staring at the creeper standing there by the door and ask do we know you? Finally wife puts 2 and 2, and recognizes the wine brand and says you must be my mom. Creeper takes off mask and sure shit, It's her mom from Montana. She decided it would be fun to surprise/scare us and come for the weekend.
Well to spoil the surprise, as we're all standing around laughing at this shinanigan we get a knock on the door with a woman standing outside. She asked about the creeper and we explained, to which she followed with: "well my two 12 yr old boys just came home and said there was a molester who wanted them to go with him to play a trick on someone. Just when I thought they were old enough to go out on their own... well It wasn't funny for me...etc." Must have been a neighbor down the street. Apparently Montana mother-in-laws don't see things the same way Washington mothers do. So I did what any other neighbor would have done in this situation, went out back with some of the other guys who were over, shot another tequilla and fired up the chainsaw. The best was when one of them started screaming. _uck the powleece.
