# going to a gaY bar???



## Road Guy (May 18, 2009)

okay.... so one of my wifes friends from work is having his birthday party at a gay bar in Atlanta, we got invited.....yes, he is gay...

I dont know why but the wife wants to go, all I know about gay bars is what I saw on Police Academy (Blue Oyster??)

Is there a protocol or some way I can identify myself as someone who doesnt want to have my ass slapped while making my way to the bathroom, nevermind, second that, I will just have to hold it the entire time if I go...


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## Chucktown PE (May 18, 2009)

Don't go. Let the wife go by herself.


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## Sschell (May 18, 2009)

dress like a straight guy. that should help.


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## Chucktown PE (May 18, 2009)

^^ Yep, wear some tight leather pants and a purple v-neck shirt.


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## Flyer_PE (May 18, 2009)

Make sure to wear something with a rainbow on it.


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## MA_PE (May 18, 2009)

I was wondering what a "gar bar" was. In the interest of being politically correct, if you like the person (you know his sexual preference) and have met his friends that are going, then who cares that it's at a gay bar.

If you get there and find it "uncomfortably gay" just excuse yourself and leave.

Conversely, like Chuck says let your wife go on her own.


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## Sschell (May 18, 2009)

shove something large and cylindrical in your pants... like a tube of tennis balls. That should keep the gays away and disinterested in you.


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## chaosiscash (May 18, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> In the interest of being politically correct, if you like the person (you know his sexual preference) and have met his friends that are going, then who cares that it's at a gay bar.
> If you get there and find it "uncomfortably gay" just excuse yourself and leave.


I'm with MA_PE. I wouldn't sweat it too much. I would guess that it would be fairly obvious to the crowd that you're straight.


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## Chucktown PE (May 18, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> I was wondering what a "gar bar" was. In the interest of being politically correct, if you like the person (you know his sexual preference) and have met his friends that are going, then who cares that it's at a gay bar.
> If you get there and find it "uncomfortably gay" just excuse yourself and leave.
> 
> Conversely, like Chuck says let your wife go on her own.



I'm not a homophobe or anything but it creaps me out when I see a dude making out with another dude. For instance, my wife watches some stupid ass show on ABC on Sunday nights called Brothers and Sisters. IMHO the show is total horse shit but while I'm watching porn on the computer she watches that crap. Anyway, a couple of weeks ago they have these two guys making out on TV. I don't know why but that makes me very uncomfortable. Therefore, I avoid the gay people that partake in the PDA. For that matter though, I don't like the PDA with straight people either.


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## Chucktown PE (May 18, 2009)

I would also wear a shirt that says "I watched 72 meat spins."


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## RIP - VTEnviro (May 18, 2009)

We had this real homphobic friend one time. He suggested going out to this one particular bar, which was not a raging gay bar, but was known locally to attract a gay crowd. He didn't realize this before suggesting we go there.

I didn't really care because:

1 - Hey, different Strokes for different folks

2 - Dude needed a lesson to be a little more tolerant

3 - Had a lady with me so it was obvious I wasn't there looking

This guy was so oblivious he didn't even realize what was going on until we left and he bitched about these guys hitting on him when all it would have taken was him saying, "Excuse me, I'm not interested."

We had a nice laugh out of that night.



> I'm with MA_PE. I wouldn't sweat it too much. I would guess that it would be fairly obvious to the crowd that you're straight.


Yeah I agree. You wouldn't even be a blip on their gaydar. And that's their term, not mine.


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## Supe (May 18, 2009)

X2. I've been in gay bars when I was in college (had some lady friends with gay best friends, so got drug along), and nobody even said a peep to me. Not so much as a blip on the gaydar, they're pretty good at knowing who is and who isn't.


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## wilheldp_PE (May 18, 2009)

I went to a ghey bar one time because they were advertising 25 cent draft beer. Luckily it was mostly lesbians in there. Doubly lucky, they started out serving Bud Light for a quarter, but ran out of that, and switched to Fosters. I think that's the only time that I have given a 300% tip, but it seemed appropriate since I got hammered off of $3 worth of beer.


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## MA_PE (May 18, 2009)

Chucktown PE said:


> I'm not a homophobe or anything but it creaps me out when I see a dude making out with another dude. For instance, my wife watches some stupid ass show on ABC on Sunday nights called Brothers and Sisters. IMHO the show is total horse shit but while I'm watching porn on the computer she watches that crap. Anyway, a couple of weeks ago they have these two guys making out on TV. I don't know why but that makes me very uncomfortable. Therefore, I avoid the gay people that have a huge problem with the PDA. For that matter though, I don't like the PDA with straight people either.


Chuckie:

Exactly, how many times do you see straight people making out a bar? It's considered poor taste then, too. From what i understand the only difference between a gay bar and a straight bar is that in a gay bar guys will tend to chat up with other guys and women will chat up with women and there's less guy/girl social interaction. Based on that appearance most sports bars are "gay bars" because they're typically populated with guys watching a game.


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## Capt Worley PE (May 18, 2009)

I wouldn't worry too much about it. You probably won't be hit on and on the off chance that you are, mention you're there with your wife and attending a friends party. As MA said, if it gets too uncomfortable, leave.


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## TouchDown (May 18, 2009)

> I went to a ghey bar one time because they were advertising 25 cent draft beer.


When I was a Freshman in college, there was a "new" dance club that opened up downtown that didn't serve alcohol - so you could be underage to get in... It just said "dance club" in the ads, nothing about being a gay bar.

We thought, that's cool - let's check it out. So 5 of us walk into this dance club and immediately we're greeted with a man dancing on a stage in the center of the room with assless chaps.

I'm not a homophobe, but that certainly caught me off guard. I don't think I've ever done a 180 so fast in my life.


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## MA_PE (May 18, 2009)

TouchDown said:


> I'm not a homophobe, but that certainly caught me off guard. I don't think I've ever done a 180 so fast in my life.


no kidding...and you couldn't even order a shot and a beer to erase the image.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (May 18, 2009)

> Exactly, how many times do you see straight people making out a bar? It's considered poor taste then, too.


Exactly. That's why people have bedrooms, with doors and curtains.



> When I was a Freshman in college... 5 of us walk into this dance club and immediately we're greeted with a man dancing on a stage in the center of the room with assless chaps.


Someone explained to me here, that chaps, by their very nature, are indeed assless.

If I saw that, I woulda walked out too. Unless it was a classmate or professor up there, in which case I woulda taken a bunch of photos.


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## Chucktown PE (May 18, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> Chuckie: Exactly, how many times do you see straight people making out a bar? It's considered poor taste then, too.



Actually, depending on the place, quite often. That's what I was trying to say (obviously not very clearly)...that it's poor taste and that I'm no fan of people making out with one another in public.


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## MGX (May 18, 2009)

Let's start a war, start a nuclear war

At the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar

Wow!

At the gay bar


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## Sschell (May 18, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> 2 - Dude needed a lesson to be a little more tolerant


hey... wait!



MA_PE said:


> Chuckie: Exactly, how many times do you see straight people making out a bar? It's considered poor taste then, too. From what i understand the only difference between a gay bar and a straight bar is that in a gay bar guys will tend to chat up with other guys and women will chat up with women and there's less guy/girl social interaction. Based on that appearance most sports bars are "gay bars" because they're typically populated with guys watching a game.


... In my experience (I hate to sterotype or generalize, thus provingVT's point above; butt, I have gay friends, and none of them will argue against the point I am about to make) gay guys will be more forward and open with their displays of PDA, esp. in an envrionment that supports it (like a gay bar)... more than likely, you are not into that type of thing, and will be no more inclined to watch (or participate) than you would if it were a straight couple, so it should be easy to tune out.

MA- from your description, I would guess never been... I have only been to one gay bar once, it is considered one of the "tamest" gay bars in southern cali (hot female gogo dancers)... and it was, in my opinion, outrageously flamboyant... entertaining, and worth the visit, but if one were homophobic, it would have been a nightmare! On the otherhand... if you've ever been to a rave... pretty much the same thing.


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## Kephart P.E. (May 18, 2009)

I don't see what the real problem is, I have only been to 1 or 2 in my life, but for the most part not a lot different than any other bar and I was with my girlfriend, so it wasn't like a bunch of dude prop. me anyway.

Plus it was one of the few times anyone has actually bought *me* drinks!


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## Dleg (May 18, 2009)

I've only ever been to gay bars out here, which are mostly Filipino and islander, and although they can be pretty flamboyant, I didn't see much PDA and they all left me alone. Which was either a case of their superior gaydar, or an devastatingly insulting statement regarding my attractiveness.....

I say go. It will be good for you to see something like that. I never knew too many gays before I lived here and ended up being around one guy in particular on our local running club, who turned out to be one of the funniest people I ever met. He then would drag big groups of us straight folks (men and women) to the gay bars with him occasionally. It certainly improved my outlook, which is crucial considering my son's pre-school teacher dresses up as a woman on the weekends. That probably would have bothered me before.....


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## Guest (May 19, 2009)

Dleg said:


> I say go. It will be good for you to see something like that. I never knew too many gays before I lived here and ended up being around one guy in particular on our local running club, who turned out to be one of the funniest people I ever met. He then would drag big groups of us straight folks (men and women) to the gay bars with him occasionally. It certainly improved my outlook, which is crucial considering my son's pre-school teacher dresses up as a woman on the weekends. That probably would have bothered me before.....


+1

Unless there are some other reasons for why you wouldn't want to go - I just wouldn't use the 'gay bar' as the reason not to go.

JR


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## MA_PE (May 19, 2009)

> they all left me alone. Which was either a case of their superior gaydar, or an devastatingly insulting statement regarding my attractiveness.....


:Locolaugh:

I think you hit the nail on the head...RG is afraid of rejection.


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## maryannette (May 19, 2009)

I'm just glad I don't go out to bars anymore.


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## Slugger926 (May 19, 2009)

Supe said:


> X2. I've been in gay bars when I was in college (had some lady friends with gay best friends, so got drug along), and nobody even said a peep to me. Not so much as a blip on the gaydar, they're pretty good at knowing who is and who isn't.


I had been drug into one in the earlier days. It was down the street from the other bars. The gals loved it for the dance music and lack of freaks hitting on them. The place was loaded with straight women.


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## DVINNY (May 19, 2009)

Mary :) said:


> I'm just glad I don't go out to bars anymore.


DITTO.


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## csb (May 19, 2009)

I bet you've been into a Victoria's Secret before too, but it doesn't mean you need a bra. You'll be fine.


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## Sschell (May 19, 2009)

Slugger926 said:


> I had been drug into one in the earlier days.


you were drugged in one before???

Did you wake up sore?


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## snickerd3 (May 19, 2009)

csb said:


> I bet you've been into a Victoria's Secret before too, but it doesn't mean you need a bra. You'll be fine.


too funny. My hubby actually has no problems going to VS. He has picked out some nice presents in the past.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (May 19, 2009)

DVINNY said:


> DITTO.


Yeah, me too.

I met up with MA at a sports bar last summer (should do this again), and went out for a beer a couple times on a Friday after work, but that's about it. I'd just so much rather grab a six pack and hang out at someone's place than do the bar scene.



snickerd3 said:


> too funny. My hubby actually has no problems going to VS. He has picked out some nice presents in the past.


rlyflag: :GotPics:

Lingerie shops never bothered me, but places like Bath and Body works are definitely an estrogen only club. I swear they put something in those lotions and potions that triggers an adverse physical response and the flight instinct in anyone with a Y chromosome.

My Mom works in the cosmetic department of a large drug store chain. So she gets all this stuff for my wife at 90% off if not free when the close stuff out. Except it's cheap shit. So I get to curl up next to someone that smells like strawberry Quik from time to time.


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## DVINNY (May 19, 2009)

I have hated the 'club' scene since college. I worked the door at one, and hope to never go back. I like the occasional sports bar for wings, beer, and a game, but that's about it.

On Friday, my wife and I went to Outback to celebrate her B-day. My good buddy owns the local one (proprietor) and he hooked us up with appetizers, drinks, 3 different desserts, it was great. We had a booth near the bar, but its all non-smoking so I love it. I could go to a non-smoking bar anytime.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (May 19, 2009)

^ I take it they have not passed a no smoking regulation for bars there?

They passed one in NY when I was in college and it made the experience so much more pleasant. VT and MA have similar rules. I recall walking into a bar in Wyoming a couple of years ago an immediately gagging my asthmatic brains out. You spend 20 minutes there and have one beer and stink like a bar towel the rest of the day.


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## wilheldp_PE (May 19, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> ^ I take it they have not passed a no smoking regulation for bars there?
> They passed one in NY when I was in college and it made the experience so much more pleasant. VT and MA have similar rules. I recall walking into a bar in Wyoming a couple of years ago an immediately gagging my asthmatic brains out. You spend 20 minutes there and have one beer and stink like a bar towel the rest of the day.


I was somewhere (don't remember where), and walked into a restaurant. They asked me "smoking or non-smoking" and I didn't understand the question. Louisville has been non-smoking in restaurants and bars for several years, and the bowling alleys just lost smoking 2 years ago.


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## MA_PE (May 19, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> I met up with MA at a sports bar last summer (should do this again)


yes you should.

I personally enjoy hanging in a bar and tossing a few back. I really enjoy going somplace with a live band.

I'm not there trying to "scoop" anyone, therefore I'm not into the "bar scene" but I like going out. of course it's not that often anymore and I need to get home early to get to bed.

Thank god for the no-smoking regulations, I can recall back in the old days where you could cut the smoke with a knife.


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## MGX (May 19, 2009)

I've been to only one gay bar, and it was so pretentious I had to leave.

A friend of mine turns 21 soon so we're taking him to the drag bar and probably a gay bar I did some remodel work on since its the only one I know about.


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## DVINNY (May 19, 2009)

When they wrote the theme song to the Flintstones, do you think they knew what they were doing?

just sayin'.


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## DVINNY (May 19, 2009)

_Flintstones, meet the Flintstones, They're a modern stoneage family. _

From the, town of Bedrock, They're a page right out of history.

Let's ride, with the family down the street, Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet.

When you're, with the Flintstones, Have a yabba dabba doo time, A dabba doo time, You'll have a.........


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## benbo (May 19, 2009)

If you go with your wife or a friend who is known to bring a lot of straight people to the bar, then the patrons will likely assume you may be straight. But I don't buy this "gaydar" stuff at all. Of course, maybe that's because I got propositioned a few times when I was in college (when I was hitch-hiking, not in a bar). And once I got hit on in Berkely by a 300 lb transvestite in a purple mini skirt. I just assumed it was because I was breathtakinly handsome in those days. But maybe I'm deep in the closet and don't realize it. I've put on about 60 lbs since then, and lost all my hair, so I'll stick with my wife - I couldn't cut it on the gay scene.


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## klk (May 19, 2009)

PDX passed a no-smoking law recently. I love being able to come home from a bar and not smell like an ashtray.


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## benbo (May 19, 2009)

Q. What's the number one pick up line in a gay bar?

A. Excuse me, may I push in your stool?


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## frazil (May 19, 2009)

DVINNY said:


> _Flintstones, meet the Flintstones, They're a modern stoneage family. _From the, town of Bedrock, They're a page right out of history.
> 
> Let's ride, with the family down the street, Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet.
> 
> When you're, with the Flintstones, Have a yabba dabba doo time, A dabba doo time, You'll have a.........


wtf :dunno:


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## wilheldp_PE (May 19, 2009)

frazil said:


> wtf :dunno:


C'mon.

Gay Old Time!


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## Dleg (May 19, 2009)

I didn't get it either. Until now.


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## Chucktown PE (May 20, 2009)

benbo said:


> Q. What's the number one pick up line in a gay bar?
> A. Excuse me, may I push in your stool?



That's pretty gross. I should have put my Hugh Hefner poster in this thread as well.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (May 20, 2009)

> Of course, maybe that's because I got propositioned a few times when I was in college (when I was hitch-hiking, not in a bar).


Did you follow the 'rules of the road?'


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## csb (May 20, 2009)

My town is non-smoking and many around the state are, but you don't appreciate it till you go to towns that aren't non-smoking. Ugh.


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