# How much for an engagement ring?



## mudpuppy (Jan 24, 2009)

Continuing my engagement/wedding poll theme, how much do you think is appropriate these days for an engagement ring?

I'm a cheapskate and spent $900 on a ring in 2003. But my income and expenses have improved since then, so now I would consider something in the $3000 range to be reasonable. But I hear numbers like $10000 and up from others. Am I completely out of touch?


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## SSmith (Jan 24, 2009)

~$300 for engagement ring/wedding band together. We used that money as part of a house down payment instead that same year.

It was practically the cheapest set the jeweler had in the store. I made the mistake of going there after work in my work clothes (shirt and tie) to look at them with her. The jeweler saw how I was dressed after we told her which one we were looking at. She gave me the spiel about 3 months salary and that a person of my means could afford a much nicer set especially with their generous credit offers. I told her a person of my means can easily find another jeweler if she brings up my salary again.

Maybe we'll get a decent set for a later anniversary, but there is no way I was going to spend that much on a ring while we are building our financial situation. 1. A house will appreciate. A ring won't do anything but get dull. 2. If there is a divorce, a house is community property and split 50/50 (or so), a ring would probably be split 0/100.


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## SSmith (Jan 24, 2009)

mudpuppy said:


> I'm a cheapskate and spent $900 on a ring in 2003. But my income and expenses have improved since then, so now I would consider something in the $3000 range to be reasonable. But I hear numbers like $10000 and up from others. Am I completely out of touch?


I would give you a hard time about being a big spender.


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## rwbailey21 (Jan 24, 2009)

I proposed to the wife while I was in grad school. Needless to say, my fixed income limited the selection. There is nothing like the feeling when your future wife is trying on the ring she really wants and the sales person tells you that you've been declined for ANY financing. :smileyballs:

We have been married for 3 1/2 years and she still loves her little 1/4 carat princess cut solitaire that I got her from Zales for $275. I graded a lot of homework for that ring.

Maybe for the 5th anniversary I will get her the ring I really wanted to get her to begin with.


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## sehad (Jan 24, 2009)

I spent about $1400, but I had been living alone and out of college for over 3 years so it wasn't that big of a deal.

I bought from a place up in New York over the phone with the agreement(that I got in writing) that if the ring(mostly the diamond) did not meet the specs that they said, I could return for full refund. I had it appraised by a third party and it appraised for almost $5000 and the color, cut, &amp; clarity were actually better than they promised.

This is risky but it paid off. I paid about 25% of the rings worth. They were a very large company that dealt in bulk. I don't know why they sold just one to me but it was nice. If you try this though I would seriously recommend that you do your homework ALOT before purchasing.


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## MA_PE (Jan 24, 2009)

your poll is "how much is appropriate?" when it should probably read "how much did you?" or "What is customary?". My answer is that it depends on an individuals personal circumstances.

Being a car guy, I'd say the question is akin to "How much is appropriate to spend on a car?" Some people (regardless of their personal financial situation) would NEVER consider buying a high end luxury or sports car, because to them it's frivolous, unnecessary, and irresponsible. Jewelry (regardless of the occasion) is similarly viewed as frivolous. An engagement/wedding ring does not need monetary value to be meaningful. As long as both parties agree a simple gold band suffices. Some people (sorry girls but it is usually the female) use the ring as a tangible example of how much love is in the relationship. the old "see he really loves me because I have a 3 carat diamond" or the old "damn I'm pretty successful, look my betrothed has a 3 carat rock".

That being said I've heard anywhere from 1-3 months salary guideline used as an example. It was probably started by the jewelers. Personally, I went through a jeweler friend who operated a small store. I bought the stone separate and picked a setting out of a catalog he had. Total many moons ago was about 1-1/2 months gross salary. Like sehad it was appraised by a third party jeweler for 3x what I paid.

My philosophy with jewelry is if an independent jeweler looks at something and appraises it for more than you paid, you did good.

my :2cents:


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## maryannette (Jan 24, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> your poll is "how much is appropriate?" when it should probably read "how much did you?" or "What is customary?". My answer is that it depends on an individuals personal circumstances.


I agree. I checked several boxes, but I absolutely believe that anybody who has to earn a living shoud never pay more than $5000 for a ring. I think a lot less is appropriate. And, I admire the "cheapskate" approach.

Many of you know that I have a daughter who is almost 23 and has a very serious boyfriend. They have informally talked of marriage. She has a degree, but not a job with benefits yet. His hours have recently been cut. They are very conservative as a couple. My MIL recently made an offer to give her engagement ring for them to use if they chose. Her husband died 10 years ago and my daughter absolutely adored him. He was a good grandfather. The ring is not what my daughter would pick ideally, but will have sentimental value that cannot be bought. I took it to her boyfriend (sticky situation) and told him that it was for her if he wanted to use it. He indicated that he will when the time is right. Don't know the final outcome, but I'm pleased that he is willing to "recycle" jewelry and save the money.


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## SSmith (Jan 24, 2009)

mary:) said:


> Many of you know that I have a daughter who is almost 23 and has a very serious boyfriend. They have informally talked of marriage. She has a degree, but not a job with benefits yet. His hours have recently been cut. They are very conservative as a couple. My MIL recently made an offer to give her engagement ring for them to use if they chose. Her husband died 10 years ago and my daughter absolutely adored him. He was a good grandfather. The ring is not what my daughter would pick ideally, but will have sentimental value that cannot be bought. I took it to her boyfriend (sticky situation) and told him that it was for her if he wanted to use it. He indicated that he will when the time is right. Don't know the final outcome, but I'm pleased that he is willing to "recycle" jewelry and save the money.


Im sure that was an awkward conversation, but I think that's a great idea! We have so little that ties us back to our earlier family generations these days. Everything is new and disposable. I do want to get a nice watch in my life just so I can pass it down when the time is right. Actually, maybe I should look into it now so my son could get it for college/marriage.


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## maryannette (Jan 24, 2009)

It was a VERY difficult conversation. I thought a lot about it before I talked to him. I had to make sure that he knew I was NOT pressuring him and the nobody's feelings would be hurt if he decided to buy a new ring. It helped that he knows how my my daughter loved her granddaddy. I still have the ring, but I know he's excited about it because he has hinted to my daughter that he has a very good surprise when the time is right. It will be cool and I'm sure there will be squealing and tears of joy when the time is right.

Don't want to high-jack the thread, but I agree that we should use old things more and not expect everything to be new.


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## mudpuppy (Jan 24, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> your poll is "how much is appropriate?" when it should probably read "how much did you?" or "What is customary?". My answer is that it depends on an individuals personal circumstances.


Actually, I deliberately chose the word "appropriate," because I want to get at the thoughts and biases underlying the topic. Certainly what is appropriate for GT_ME with his enormous salary is different than most of the rest of us. I'm not saying anyone is right or wrong, just curious to see what others' take is on the subject.

But apparently I am out of touch on what is "customary" as well. . . I had thought it was 3 - 6 weeks salary, but now it's 1 - 3 months?


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## Chucktown PE (Jan 24, 2009)

I think I spent a little bit more than $5k on my wife's engagement ring. We recently redid our insurance and it appraised for around $9k.

I guess I'm a little different on this one. I don't spend a lot of money on myself but I see a lot of guys that have nice cars and TVs then buy their future wives specs for an engagement ring. My old pastor says that for a lot of people, their money is where their heart is. I know my wife would have been happy with a spec but I wanted to buy her something that would be above and beyond. I was in graduate school when I proposed and I didn't have a lot of money but I was making $20k a year with minimal living expenses so I guess I went the 3 month salary route.

On the other hand, my in-laws bought both of my BILs rings for their wives. They're huge and dwarf my wife's but I think it carries very little meaning when someone's parents buy your engagement ring?


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## snickerd3 (Jan 24, 2009)

I think it really depends on the situation and the girl. Not sure how much the the price of gold/platinum have increased the price of engagement rings, but I'm not that into huge stones. My engagement ring is half carat in a platinum setting bc I am sensitive to gold and it is too soft of a metal. If one spends more than 1-2K it is probably a really big rock or from some big designer. Once you get past half carat they begin to look fake, but that is just my opinion.


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## DVINNY (Jan 24, 2009)

I was 23 when I proposed, and I paid $2,000 for a 1K solitaire on a simple little gold band.

Since then, I took the stone out, and had it set in a white gold setting with many other smaller diamonds around it, for an extra $1,400. That was 4 years ago, and was pretty much to make up for my buying the Camaro. 

To spend 2 months salary on a ring is asinine, in my opinion.

(I'm also guessing the 2 above that selected $5,000 to $10,000 are both female  )


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## DVINNY (Jan 24, 2009)

and further.........

I had this discussion with a young engineer in the office recently. I told him the only time anyone gives two shits about that ring is for the first couple of months when she's telling everyone "I'm engaged" and they say "let me see"

After that, not one person could care less. Sorry to be so truthful about the scam.


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## MGX (Jan 24, 2009)

I was talking to a friend of mine who's been married for 45 years about this, he told me not to worry if the engagement ring is inexpensive since it can be 'made up' later when I'm some hot shit PE. He's bought his wife too much jewelery to inventory over the years and the wife keeps her engagement ring in a box somewhere. What I'd like to buy costs more than I paid for my car and has no useful function at all.

That news is comforting.


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## EM_PS (Jan 24, 2009)

the way i did it the 1st time, i bought a nice &lt;$500 ring for the proposal - then, after the marriage, i spent the bigger $$ (I forget how much) to have a 'wrap' or holder added around the engagement ring. This way, you should be able to keep whole thing at a reasonable price, and it makes for a rather significant wedding ring when its done, having all started with that simple engagement ring at proposal.

Soo, post-starter marriage  , my mom so liked my new fiance that she gave me her mom's wedding ring (the proverbial family stone) to give to my fiance. It pretty well floored my wife (fiance at time). And after the wedding / honeymoon, we did same thing w/ the ring, having a wrap w/ additional stones added around the antique ring - so now the family stone is bigger &amp; grander! Heirlooms rock, but it takes the "right" fiance to bring them out of hiding. Otherwise, start small, finish on a grander scale using initial base. The big $$ should be spent after the wedding - not before it on the engagement ring :2cents:


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## wilheldp_PE (Jan 24, 2009)

My grandmother left me a stone when she died because she smuggled a bunch of diamonds back from Brussels in her bra when she was in her 20s or 30s. It's a fairly big diamond, so all I need to do is provide the setting when the time is right. Now I just have to find a worthy finger to put one on.


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## benbo (Jan 24, 2009)

wilheldp_PE said:


> My grandmother left me a stone when she died because she smuggled a bunch of diamonds back from Brussels in her bra when she was in her 20s or 30s. It's a fairly big diamond, so all I need to do is provide the setting when the time is right. Now I just have to find a worthy finger to put one on.


That's going to be a ring with a story nobody can match, for sure.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 24, 2009)

I spent ~$3000 on a ring in June of '06. I was waiting for PE results at that point, to give you an idea of where I was on the career ladder. My attitude on cost was: "How much is reasonable to spend where its ok if it's a short term hit, but not so expensive that I'm screwed if a rainy day comes along."

I got a 0.73 carat round brilliant cut, set in a trellis setting. It looks nice on her, and the setting is not so gaudy where it gets in the way of things (taking gloves on and off, etc.) when she does lab work.

She is low key when it comes to jewelry and a down to earth person. I don't think she would been happy if I blew all my money on some brick she didn't like in the first place. She said I did a good job of matching it to her tastes and personality.

I never would have felt comfortable giving her grandmother's ring or anything like that. It would have felt too much like a hand me down to me. For those that went that route, was it mainly a cost issue or were you approached by a family member who said something like, "I'm sure grandma would have wanted you to have this..." or something to that effect?

I also don't think I would like to 'add-on' features as time goes on. It just somehow wouldn't have the same meaning to me because it's not really the same ring anymore. Then again if I was going to spend a whole bunch of money on her just for fun, jewelry wouldn't be the thing that would light up her eyes anyway.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 24, 2009)

> My grandmother left me a stone when she died because she smuggled a bunch of diamonds back from Brussels in her bra when she was in her 20s or 30s. It's a fairly big diamond, so all I need to do is provide the setting when the time is right.


I'd say the bra made an excellent setting at one point. That's awesome, your granny was an international jewel smuggler!


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## wilheldp_PE (Jan 24, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> I'd say the bra made an excellent setting at one point. That's awesome, your granny was an international jewel smuggler!


Yeah, it's kinda cool that she avoided paying taxes to "the man" back in the day. I'm proud of her.


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## NCcarguy (Jan 24, 2009)

I would buy the biggest stone (that's not total crap, or yellow) for 2k, and call it good. I think that gets a decent size, good enough quality, and you're not spending so much money that could be used for other things.

That's what I did anyway....hummm....and 10 years later, we don't get along so good???? I wonder if there's any correlation?


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## maryannette (Jan 24, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> I never would have felt comfortable giving her grandmother's ring or anything like that. It would have felt too much like a hand me down to me. For those that went that route, was it mainly a cost issue or were you approached by a family member who said something like, "I'm sure grandma would have wanted you to have this..." or something to that effect?


Well, I told the story of my MIL and daughter and her boyfriend. This will work so well because of the sentimental connection, but also because our family and bf's family are not big spenders on jewelry. Not that there is anything wrong with it, but just not our style. My engagement ring is about 1/2 carat and simple. I wear it most of time. I have substituted my grandmother's wedding band for mine and don't wear mine anymore. My grandmother died in 2001 at the age of 101 and I inherited her ring. Like I said, nothing wrong with buying a nice ring within reason, but there are alternatives.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 24, 2009)

Yeah I am not trying jumping on anyone, just curious. We're not terribly sentimental folks, kinda the opposite to a fault sometimes I think.



> I have substituted my grandmother's wedding band for mine and don't wear mine anymore.


I don't wear my wedding band either. I have slim fingers and fat knuckles. It's impossible to get on and off over my knuckles, but then looks like a hula loop at the base of my finger. It's really annoying.

I've got an amusing picture from my wedding that shows me with my face all scrunched up tugging at it not 15 minutes after the ceremony. Someone made sure that one went in the scrapbook to make sure I wouldn't live it down anytime soon.

Which sucks because I like the ring and even paid extra to get the date inscribed on the inside. It's white gold with a hammered finish and I think looks sharp.


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## EM_PS (Jan 24, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> I never would have felt comfortable giving her grandmother's ring or anything like that. It would have felt too much like a hand me down to me. For those that went that route, was it mainly a cost issue or were you approached by a family member who said something like, "I'm sure grandma would have wanted you to have this..." or something to that effect?


Hmm, i guess its a bit of a crap shoot, but what's to be comfortable with? Spending $$ vs giving an heirloom isn't any more valid a proposal nor offers any greater assurance that the recipient will like it or even say yes. When an heirloom like that gets passed down, 1st off, it won't be a $110 special from Kay's. Secondly, for whichever relative to bestow upon you to give away is an incredible honor to you and towards their future inlaw. Thirdly, the proposee will recognize, if he / she has any semblance of sociological skills, what a significant honor it is that this ring be passed on to him / her. I mean, you're not gonna give a gold setting to a fiance that prefers white gold or platinum or whatever - just because the heirloom is offered doesn't mean it will _have_ to be used, certainly.



VTEnviro said:


> I also don't think I would like to 'add-on' features as time goes on. It just somehow wouldn't have the same meaning to me because it's not really the same ring anymore. Then again if I was going to spend a whole bunch of money on her just for fun, jewelry wouldn't be the thing that would light up her eyes anyway.


you do realize the difference between an engagement ring and an actual wedding band? It never is the same ring after the marriage takes place - usually the actual 'wedding band' gets added to the engagement ring, if it was a matched set at purchase, or you buy a wrap or surround for the engagement ring, as i had to. For your $3K ring, did your wife wear it the whole time of engagement, and then have it presented at the wedding, only to wear the exact same ring post-wedding? that is not the typical scenario, but whatever floats your boat, its all good.


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## DVINNY (Jan 24, 2009)

So this guy stop in at a citrus grove and goes over to where the foreman is standing. The guys asks the foreman, "I'm lookin' for a job pickin' fruit".

The boss looks at the guy and asks, "Ever picked lemons before". The guy answers, "Well, ya... Been married three times".


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## sehad (Jan 24, 2009)

DVINNY said:


> So this guy stop in at a citrus grove and goes over to where the foreman is standing. The guys asks the foreman, "I'm lookin' for a job pickin' fruit".The boss looks at the guy and asks, "Ever picked lemons before". The guy answers, "Well, ya... Been married three times".


Bravo!!! Does the lemon law apply to wives? Just curious.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 24, 2009)

^ And if not, can you at least get a few thousand $$$ just for turning in the old, rundown model for something with a little more going on in the trunk and improved performance with her top down?


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## MA_PE (Jan 25, 2009)

As I get closer, I'm hoping the "trade a 50 for two 25's" is real.


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## engineergurl (Jan 25, 2009)

I agree with Mary, I checked all the boxes up to $5K... there is no real need for a ring or any jewlery in my opinion that should be worth more than that... but it is up to the individual.

We got our bands at walmart about a week after we got married, and spent a hundred dollars on the two.. the diamond came a year later and I'm pretty sure the whole ring was about $1700... it appraised for about double that


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## DVINNY (Jan 25, 2009)

I'm glad to see we have some level headed female's on this board. (we already knew that)

I had a conversation with a girl I knew a few years back and she was braggin' about "if a guy ever brought her a ring smaller than 2karat, she'd tell him to hit the road".

My response was, "I would hope none of them consider giving you anything more than one out of a cracker jack box". for a guy to put up with her being that delusional and self-centered would be an obvious disaster waiting to happen.

She not likey my answer. (one of my wife's old acquaintances)


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## Dleg (Jan 25, 2009)

I spent $2k. I had no idea what t expect when I started, other than the jewelry industry "guidelines" (give us all your money, sucka!) Fortunately for me, my wife works in a lab and has to wear latex gloves all the time, so a big pointy rock was out of the question. Plus, I personally find the big pointy rock to be rather tasteless.

Instead, we ended up spending less to get something that was flush-mounted, which apparently automatically limits the size of the stone anyway, as there aren't that many flush-mounted options around (or there weren't back then, anyway). Plus, it looks "different" than all her friend's rings, and so it attracts more attention, which from my perspective means it probably has even greater value.

Having gone through all that, I don't think anyone (in our tax bracket) should consider anything more than around $3k. If I had a fiancee that insisted on more, that would tell me something about the fiancee and I would move along.


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## SkyWarp (Jan 25, 2009)

I don't know what's appropriate, I spent around 2 months salary on a custom ring. I spent a lot of time looking but I'm happier with what I had made versus anything I saw online or in a store.


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## Supe (Jan 26, 2009)

Its appropriate to spend only as many quarters as necessary to get it out of the machine. Tops $1 for a Ring Pop.


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## IlliniASU (Jan 26, 2009)

Well, I'm kind of going out on a limb here, at the risk of being labeled.

My husband and I spent quite a significant amount on my engagement ring, along with the wedding bands. Yes, bands. I have a 1.22 carat brilliant cut center stone, D color, VS2 clarity, with 4 smaller diamonds on either side. I wear a band on either side of the engagement ring, and they each have 9 smaller diamonds, the same size as the side diamonds on the engagement ring. The set is platinum. The whole deal was about 16.5k.

We made the purchase together, although he did pay for all but about 3k of it. We spent about 6 months shopping for rings/wedding sets so we were able to get a good idea of what was out there and what we liked. We already owned a home at the time, and we weren't planning on having the wedding for about a year and a half. (We've been married about two years now.) I don't have any other jewelry to speak of. Most of our 'significant' purchases now are towards upgrading his Jeep and his gun collection. Trust me, that adds up over time!


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## Chucktown PE (Jan 26, 2009)

IlliniASU said:


> Well, I'm kind of going out on a limb here, at the risk of being labeled.
> My husband and I spent quite a significant amount on my engagement ring, along with the wedding bands. Yes, bands. I have a 1.22 carat brilliant cut center stone, D color, VS2 clarity, with 4 smaller diamonds on either side. I wear a band on either side of the engagement ring, and they each have 9 smaller diamonds, the same size as the side diamonds on the engagement ring. The set is platinum. The whole deal was about 16.5k.
> 
> We made the purchase together, although he did pay for all but about 3k of it. We spent about 6 months shopping for rings/wedding sets so we were able to get a good idea of what was out there and what we liked. We already owned a home at the time, and we weren't planning on having the wedding for about a year and a half. (We've been married about two years now.) I don't have any other jewelry to speak of. Most of our 'significant' purchases now are towards upgrading his Jeep and his gun collection. Trust me, that adds up over time!



That's exactly what I was eluding to Ill. You would have probably been a little peeved (and rightly so in my opinion) if your husband had a kick ass gun collection and/or Jeep and spent $500 on your ring at Sam's wholesale (not knocking Sam's). I didn't think about my guns in my post about "not spending much money on myself" and thinking about it, I would say that my gun collection is worth about as much as my wife's ring.

I don't think there is anything wrong with having nice jewelry. Plus, all these heirlooms that people are talking about have to come from somewhere.


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## roadwreck (Jan 26, 2009)

IlliniASU said:


> The whole deal was about 16.5k.


:blink:


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## Supe (Jan 26, 2009)

Wait...

Can we just buy the women engagement guns instead?


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## IlliniASU (Jan 26, 2009)

Supebeard said:


> Wait...
> Can we just buy the women engagement guns instead?



LOL. I know a woman who asked for a bassoon instead... whatever floats your boat!


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## Dexman1349 (Jan 26, 2009)

I think I paid about $150 for the engagement ring and $1k each for matching wedding bands. We were in college and sharing a small 1 bedroom appartment. Basically the $150 was about all I could afford at the time and the only reason we could drop $2k on the wedding bands was because of their lay-away program.

We've been married for over 7 years and together for over 10 and the largest (and only) diamond I have given her was a "chip" in a promise ring after about 1 year of dating. Her engagement ring was a small gold band with a saffire (sp?) and our wedding bands are a solid platinum with a gold inlay along the center (no stones).


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## Chucktown PE (Jan 26, 2009)

IlliniASU said:


> LOL. I know a woman who asked for a bassoon instead... whatever floats your boat!



Check out the bling on that woodwind.


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## IlliniASU (Jan 26, 2009)

Chucktown PE said:


> That's exactly what I was eluding to Ill. You would have probably been a little peeved (and rightly so in my opinion) if your husband had a kick ass gun collection and/or Jeep and spent $500 on your ring at Sam's wholesale (not knocking Sam's). I didn't think about my guns in my post about "not spending much money on myself" and thinking about it, I would say that my gun collection is worth about as much as my wife's ring.
> I don't think there is anything wrong with having nice jewelry. Plus, all these heirlooms that people are talking about have to come from somewhere.


Chucktown, I think we're the only ones in this boat. I think it comes down to a personal decision as to what you want to spend your money on, and how much. Some people cannot fathom spending so much on jewelry, but this sort of thing is a once in a lifetime sort of purchase. It's a lot of money up front.


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## MonteBiker (Jan 26, 2009)

As long as you clarify in the proposal that "Honey... Don't think of it as fake diamond... Think of it as Genuine Cubic Zirconia!". IF she buys into that you are golden. Let's just say that i have a really forgiving wife.


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## Chucktown PE (Jan 26, 2009)

MonteBiker said:


> As long as you clarify in the proposal that "Honey... Don't think of it as fake diamond... Think of it as Genuine Cubic Zirconia!". IF she buys into that you are golden. Let's just say that i have a really forgiving wife.



I know a girl whose former fiance' did the same thing. He gave her a 2 carat CZ and tried to pawn it off as real. She believed him and then one of the prongs got loose. She took it to the jeweler to have it fixed and she asked him about putting in the safe overnight. The jeweler (in Chicago) asked her why the f she would care about it being in the safe overnight due to it being worth around $250. She broke off the engagement, not because of the value, but because he lied to everyone about the thing.


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## csb (Jan 26, 2009)

Okay, my engagement ring was $5K and my wedding band was $1500 (which I purchased, along with his $600 band). It's a .74 carat and it's the right size for me. I wasn't pushing for a huge ring...I wanted a simple solitaire and I wanted platinum.

I could wax poetic about how they were blessed during the ceremony as a sign of our love and commitment...but they're shiny and I like them


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 26, 2009)

Speaking of shiny, my wife really needs to get hers cleaned. Same with her wedding ring, which is one of those deals with the embedded diamonds in it. They have about as much luster as one of those shitty aluminum Order of the Engineer rings at this point.


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## chaosiscash (Jan 26, 2009)

I'm in the "it depends on the situation" arena. I spend about $4000 on my wife's engagement ring, which at the time was about a month's gross salary for me. Its all about what you want to spend your money on.

Some people may see jewelry as a waste of money, but those same people may spend money on something that a jewelry buyer may see as a waste. I was out in Vegas last week, and suprised my wife with a (belated) 5-year anniversary gift, a necklace she has been wanting from Tiffany. Was the something more "practical" I could have used the money on? Sure. But she wanted it, we could afford it, and I like making her happy.


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## klk (Jan 26, 2009)

I think my hubby spent around 3K on my engagement ring. I didn't want anything more expensive than that because I would be afraid of losing it. I only wear it now for special occasions because it doesn't fit well with the wedding band. I really should get it resized.

My coworker keeps losing his wedding band, I think he's on his 3rd or 4th ring now, we joke he should purchase them in bulk so he doesn't have to explain to his wife why he lost his ring again . . .


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## roadwreck (Jan 26, 2009)

My wife's ring was $2500. My wedding band was $26.


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## FLBuff PE (Jan 26, 2009)

roadwreck said:


> My wife's ring was $2500. My wedding band was $26.


Is that how much the Cracker Jack box it came from cost?


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## roadwreck (Jan 26, 2009)

FLBuff PE said:


> Is that how much the Cracker Jack box it came from cost?


No it was how much I spent at the vending machine before I was finally able to snag it with that stupid robotic claw.

actually it's really easy to find a ring (for men) that cheap. Mine is titanium tungsten

http://shop.ebay.com/items/_W0QQ_nkwZtitan...fromZR40QQ_mdoZ

Edit: ops, I was in a rush to get out the door so I guess I wasn't paying attention to what I was typing, my rings tungsten not titanium.


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## IlliniASU (Jan 26, 2009)

My husband's 'ceremony' wedding band is tungsten but he wears a titanium band everyday, $80. It gets beaten up pretty badly because he has to go out on the floor sometimes with all of the machinery. He's also on his third titanium band. He lost one and had to get another resized because he lost so much weight. His tungsten band was around $500. He didn't want any 'bling', so to speak.


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## snickerd3 (Jan 26, 2009)

IlliniASU said:


> My husband's 'ceremony' wedding band is tungsten but he wears a titanium band everyday, $80. It gets beaten up pretty badly because he has to go out on the floor sometimes with all of the machinery. He's also on his third titanium band. He lost one and had to get another resized because he lost so much weight. His tungsten band was around $500. He didn't want any 'bling', so to speak.


My hubby has a tungsten ring too. At the time he worked in the NMR world so he was constantly working right next to super conducting magnets. Tungsten has the least amount of magnetic sensitivity. He has seen a metal zipblade fly off a table in the lab and spin towards the magnet.


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## Dleg (Jan 26, 2009)

If you're working around a lot of machinery, it's best not to wear the ring at all.

I had a crewman in my oil field days who was missing his ring finger, and not even because of machinery. He just got it caught in the door clasp of our instrument cab, and jumped to the ground, rather than taking the 4 step stairs, becuase he was in a "hurry". His ring finger was what they call "de-gloved" and there was nothing the doctors could do but remove it.


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## DVINNY (Jan 26, 2009)

roadwreck said:


> My wife's ring was $2500. My wedding band was $26.


Haha, I got you beat. Mine was $19.95.

When I asked the price, the girl said 19 95, I said "WHAT?" my wife looked at me and said "yeah, as in 20 dollars", I said "I'll TAKE IT!"

I needed a tough 10k that would not get bent up while I was lifting weights, etc. It still is in great shape 10 years later.


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## wilheldp_PE (Jan 26, 2009)

My buddy has a Tungsten Carbide wedding ring. I don't remember how much he said it cost, but it was sub-$100. That thing is made out of the same material as machine tools, so I'm pretty sure he's never going to have a scratch on it.


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## SkyWarp (Jan 26, 2009)

klk_pdx said:


> I think my hubby spent around 3K on my engagement ring. I didn't want anything more expensive than that because I would be afraid of losing it.


 Adding hers to the insurance policy didn't add too much yearly cost.


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## MA_PE (Jan 26, 2009)

came home from work one day after we were married and my wife said she took all the jewelry I had given (dating, bdays, etc./engagement/wedding) to her jeweler to be appraised for insurance purposes. I was pleased to see all the appraisals were substantially higher than I had paid. The jeweler I was using was a long time friend of a friend and I trusted him. He lived up to the trust well.


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## Dleg (Jan 26, 2009)

I lost my wedding band less than 2 years after we were married - I didn't like the feel of a ring on my finger, and so I got it a little big to begin with. Ended up sliding off my finger, unbeknownst to me, wile running through the jungle setting the 1000th Hash trail in 2004. Coming home from that rager of a party and having to explain how my wedding ring got lost was a .... difficult.... situation. I got the replacement ($380 I think) sized correctly, and always wear gloves when running in the jungle now (I should follow my own safety advice and take it off, but I am too afraid of misplacing it).


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## Flyer_PE (Jan 26, 2009)

Dleg said:


> If you're working around a lot of machinery, it's best not to wear the ring at all.


Mine goes in my pocket or is locked up in my computer case any time I'm in the field. I've seen the results of finding a live 480V circuit with a wedding band.


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## chaosiscash (Jan 27, 2009)

Flyer_PE said:


> Mine goes in my pocket or is locked up in my computer case any time I'm in the field. I've seen the results of finding a live 480V circuit with a wedding band.


Ditto. If you do electrical work, no rings in the field.


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## Capt Worley PE (Jan 27, 2009)

Dleg said:


> If you're working around a lot of machinery, it's best not to wear the ring at all.
> I had a crewman in my oil field days who was missing his ring finger, and not even because of machinery. He just got it caught in the door clasp of our instrument cab, and jumped to the ground, rather than taking the 4 step stairs, becuase he was in a "hurry". His ring finger was what they call "de-gloved" and there was nothing the doctors could do but remove it.


They were banned on the flightline, and I saw a guy do a lesser version of what you describe when the ring got caught on the guide rail for a 40K loader.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 27, 2009)

Am I the only guy here who basically never wears his ring?


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## MA_PE (Jan 27, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> Am I the only guy here who basically never wears his ring?


Nope.

Right when we got married I wore it. I had a habit of taking it off and putting next to the sink everytime I washed my hands. I left in the hotel was we were leaving to return from our honeymoon. I noticed before we got out of the parking lot, but in short order I had a number of similar episodes. I'm not a jewelry person, so I decided to be safe I'd just leave it at home. I used to wear it whenever I wore a suit, but have essentially given up that practice, too. I tell my wife that not wearing a ring doesn't make me any less married. She's fine with it.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 27, 2009)

> I'm not a jewelry person, so I decided to be safe I'd just leave it at home. I used to wear it whenever I wore a suit, but have essentially given up that practice, too. I tell my wife that not wearing a ring doesn't make me any less married. She's fine with it.


It used to bother my wife a little, but she's fine with it now. I bust it out on sentimental occasions like anniversaries or formal events where I need to dress nice.

I'm not a jewelry guy either. A couple days after we got married we were frolicking around in an old volcanic basin in Idaho. The air temp was around 102 and the black rocks and soil were even hotter. Between the heat and being a little bit dehydrated, my fingers puffed up a bit. I flipped when I realized I couldn't the ring off right then. I didn't even look at that thing for another week.


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## EM_PS (Jan 27, 2009)

^ that's mindbottling!

I take my ring off at night so i can pretend that I'm single in my dreams :joke:

Truthfully, i would feel naked w/ my wedding ring off. I do take it off for pounding irons in ground or heavy manual labor - although I usually just wear work gloves on those occasions; otherwise, the ring fits good to where it would never unknowingly fly off - and my wife (&amp; I) are traditional enough i guess to where neither one would really like the idea of convenience wearing or whatever - it's interesting, hearing of others customs B)


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## Capt Worley PE (Jan 27, 2009)

I think I've taken mine off maybe five times in 10+ years, and even then it was five minutes, max. I'd feel naked without it, although it took me a few years to truly get used to it (I'm not a jewelry person).


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## tymr (Jan 27, 2009)

I don't remember what my hubby paid for the diamond but I wanted a simple setting and cared more about color than I did carats. It is approximately 1/2 carat. My wedding band was thrown in for free. My hubby and I aren't the type to upgrade either.

The hubby's ring is made of titanium, and he was welding within the first week we got married (no honeymoon) and got slag all over it. It's a tough ring but didn't stay shiny and new very long. I don't remember how much I paid for it. I didn't realize guys bought their own wedding rings.


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## TXengrChickPE (Jan 27, 2009)

I honestly have no clue how much my ring cost... but I like it and that's all that really matters 

I didn't wear it for most of my pregnancy because of swelling... hubby hated that I wasn't wearing it, so I put it on a necklace.


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## dagget (Jan 27, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> Am I the only guy here who basically never wears his ring?


Never wear a ring because I don't have one. My wife has an engagement ring, ruby not diamond since she doesn't like diamonds. Don't remember what I paid for it but I think under $1000. (We just had our 13th aniversary yesterday, and I can't remember details like that from 14 years ago). She wears it pretty routinely.

Neither of us wanted wedding bands and so we never bought them.

As for what 'should' you spend, I think its the same answer as what you should spend on a house or car, etc. What you can afford.


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## gymrat1279 PE (Jan 28, 2009)

I'm not married or engaged yet, but it really irritates me for some reason when I know men are married and don't wear their wedding rings. There are several people at work that do that who are always in the office. I understand if you have to take it off if you are working in the field or with machinery where there is going to be a safety risk, but I think people should wear it the rest of the time if they are married. You'll get used to wearing rings. If I forget to put on a couple rings that I wear daily, my fingers feel naked. My parents separated for a bit last year and are back together now and happy and when I saw that my dad didn't wear his ring for awhile it really bugged me.


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## csb (Jan 28, 2009)

TXengrChickPE said:


> I honestly have no clue how much my ring cost... but I like it and that's all that really matters
> I didn't wear it for most of my pregnancy because of swelling... hubby hated that I wasn't wearing it, so I put it on a necklace.


This was me too...I was a huge swollen mess, so I ended up wearing a fake ring from my grandmother. There were too many nights with the real ring where I was soaking my hand in ice just to get them off my hand.


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## EM_PS (Jan 28, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> I tell my wife that not wearing a ring doesn't make me any less married. She's fine with it.





gymrat1279 PE said:


> My parents separated for a bit last year and are back together now and happy and when I saw that my dad didn't wear his ring for awhile it really bugged me.


gymrat brings up an interesting point. . .MA_PE, you have older children, right? Have they ever wondered or questioned why dad never wears his wedding ring? I'm just curious, wondering if 'societal expectation' trickles enough into their lives where they've maybe wondered about it.

pathetic storytime: when i separated from &amp; ultimately divorced my 1st wife, i kept my ring on not only thru the divorce, but for a time past it. The folks i worked with back then were all single w/ kid(s) or divorced w/ kid(s), and i first off couldn't accept the fact that I had unceremoniously become their 'peer' (though w/ out kids), and secondly cuz i didn't want anybody hassling me until i could deal w/ it apathetically - by the time someone figured out my ex &amp; I were no longer together, i was totally 'golden' about it. The ring totally served as my privacy keeper in a way - then it got pawned!


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## MA_PE (Jan 28, 2009)

error_matrix said:


> gymrat brings up an interesting point. . .MA_PE, you have older children, right? Have they ever wondered or questioned why dad never wears his wedding ring? I'm just curious, wondering if 'societal expectation' trickles enough into their lives where they've maybe wondered about it.


Yes I do have older kids (2 boys). I don't recall any specific discussions about it but I decided not wear right after we got married and before the kids were born. FWIW, at the the time I was working in our lab doing lots of various materials testing and using all kinds of power tools (band saws, routers, belt sanders, etc.

I think I brushed the dust off a couple of times for weddings so the kids know I have one, but they are quite aware that I don't care for jewelery of any kind.

Short answer is that I don't think they view a wedding band as a symbol of whether I love thier mother or not. Sounds like gymrat's experience was that when dad took off the ring he was showing that he no longer wanted to be associated with mom. I can see that, but that's not my circumstance and I don't believe either of my sons lose any sleep over it.

FWIW, they also don't see me hitting on or flirting with women when we go out.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jan 28, 2009)

> FWIW, they also don't see me hitting on or flirting with women when we go out.


Great point!


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## EM_PS (Jan 28, 2009)

yeah i figured it was probably a total non-issue  - was just curious because it is such a strong societal symbol, though arguably, most affecting of adult aged folk or FBI profilers.


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## roadwreck (Jan 28, 2009)

My dad never wore a wedding band. Still and still doesn't. I never thought much about it, he just isn't the sort to wear jewelry.


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## GA Tech (Jan 28, 2009)

I got engaged nearly a year ago and still haven't gotten the engagement ring. Now that I think about it, it would be a great celebration for the upcoming "anniversary"!

{Off to go get ring...}


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## GA Tech (Jan 28, 2009)

roadwreck said:


> My dad never wore a wedding band. Still and still doesn't. I never thought much about it, he just isn't the sort to wear jewelry.


You may have some unknown brothers and sisters. Just sayin'...(j/k)


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## roadwreck (Jan 28, 2009)

GA Tech said:


> You may have some unknown brothers and sisters. Just sayin'...(j/k)


unlikely, I think my father had his hands pretty full with the kids I know about.


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## Katiebug (Feb 16, 2009)

Late to the party, as usual, but when we got engaged I'd just finished college and Mr. Bug was still a poor student. He used almost all of his savings to buy my engagement ring. It was really a sacrifice for him to get me a "decent" ring. It's smaller than most of our friends' and relatives', but not significantly so. I think the first time around he spent about $1400, and then we split the $800 cost to have it re-set in platinum (from white gold) 6 months before the wedding due to the sensitivity I'd developed to the nickel in the white gold setting. It appraises a bit higher than we paid for it, so I think we're doing all right.

I didn't want a big diamond and in the end I'm glad my engagement ring is a half carat solitaire, because I prefer solitaires and it goes well with my wedding ring. My setting is very low and is a semi-bezel set, so the diamond doesn't get dinged up, is extremely unlikely to get loose in the setting, and there are no prongs to scratch our toddler nephew when I'm chasing around after him.

My wedding band is really beautiful...I cared about having a band that could be worn on its own, so I got a channel-set diamond band, a bit over 1 carat total weight. Set in platinum, again. I adore it. Mr. Bug wears a simple platinum band. I paid through the nose for it since it's "designer", but he likes it, and after he shelled out about $4500 on my two rings I figured it was the least I could do to hook him up with the ring he really wanted.

I know I'm not _supposed_ to wear my rings in the field, but I do; our mechanics absolutely don't. Most engineers keep them on, though, and none of us have lost a finger yet. I always wear them at our test facility. It's not like I'm handling rotating machinery while it's rotating (or has the potential to do so). I keep it on when cutting samples in the lab or whatever...we have guarding and interlocks anyways and my fingers aren't in any additional danger from the rings.

My dad hasn't worn his ring for a few decades (he still has it), and my mom lost her engagement ring years ago and just wears her band since she's a nurse and washes her hands all the time at work. They've been married for 33 years on Valentine's Day and it's never bothered me that Dad doesn't wear his ring.


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## frazil (Feb 16, 2009)

My husband and I have simple white gold bands which we bought for $280 about a year after we were married (eloped). I never wanted a diamond, though the older I get the more attracted I am to shiny objects, so who knows maybe someday I'll want one.


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## rudy (Feb 17, 2009)

Congratulations mudpuppy on your upcoming engagement !!!

I don't know how much my ring cost. It is a 2-carat, with double wedding bands. My hubby's is a gold band. We're not into jewelry. I'm afraid of losing mine when I pull off my gloves at work. So, we don't wear them -- only to church, when we go out on special occasions, or if we go out separately with our friends. We've been married 15 years. Our kids have never asked us about why we don't wear them. I guess because we really never wore them before they were born.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Feb 17, 2009)

frazil said:


> I never wanted a diamond, though the older I get the more attracted I am to shiny objects, so who knows maybe someday I'll want one.


Tin foil is shiny and for $3.99 you can get a whole roll of it. More bang for your buck.


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## MA_PE (Feb 17, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> Tin foil is shiny and for $3.99 you can get a whole roll of it. More bang for your buck.


I'd wager the buck that brings home a roll of tin foil for his wife gets no bang whatsoever.


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## mudpuppy (Feb 17, 2009)

rudy said:


> Congratulations mudpuppy on your upcoming engagement !!!


I'm not getting engaged! :lmao: I was just curious.

But do you know any eligible bachelorettes?


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## rudy (Feb 18, 2009)

mudpuppy said:


> I'm not getting engaged! :lmao: I was just curious.
> But do you know any eligible bachelorettes?


oopppsssiiieee. sorry. don't know of any bachelorettes. besides, even if i did, you'd be too good for them.


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## klk (Feb 18, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> I'd wager the buck that brings home a roll of tin foil for his wife gets no bang whatsoever.


I suspect you are very correct!


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## P.E. Luchion (Feb 18, 2009)

So when they say 1-3 months salary is is Gross or net?


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## Guest (Feb 24, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> Am I the only guy here who basically never wears his ring?


I didn't wear my wedding band. It turned out that the one that the Soon-2-Be ex-Mrs. JR bought me was EXTREMELY uncomfortable and completely not what I would wear for myself. I ended up leaving it off after it created all sorts of chafing/irritation issues.

Later, I bought a very nice platinum wedding band as a replacement, but again didn't wear it, for lots of different reasons. Mainly, because I was concerned about wearing/losing a $3k ring! hmy:



TXengrChickPE said:


> I honestly have no clue how much my ring cost... but I like it and that's all that really matters


That is what counts. I think if I had to do it again .. I kinda like the tungsten carbide rings ... not real expensive and look pretty unique. 



gymrat1279 PE said:


> I'm not married or engaged yet, but it really irritates me for some reason when I know men are married and don't wear their wedding rings.


How do you feel about women who don't wear wedding rings/bands? I know of many MORE women who are deceptive about their marital status than men ... of course, based on my own empirical observations over the last few years. :brickwall:

As for me, you may note from above, there were reasons why I didn't wear my ring ... but in the end it was because I didn't feel like I was married or had much reason to celebrate or 'announce' my marriage. Personal choice of course, but there are reasons to not wear a wedding band/ring, if for nothing else that you don't feel the need to display a symbol of your union, IMHO. 



MA_PE said:


> FWIW, they also don't see me hitting on or flirting with women when we go out.


Well, this was the case for me as well - I NEVER did anything nefarious while it was clear that I was still with the Soon-2-be ex-Mrs. JR. Of course, once it was clear we were not going to be together .. well, personal choices again. 



rudy said:


> oopppsssiiieee. sorry. don't know of any bachelorettes. besides, even if i did, you'd be too good for them.


Snap!! :Locolaugh:

I am working on a plan for mudpuppy .. just don't tell him! Ssshhh ... 



P.E. Luchion said:


> So when they say 1-3 months salary is is Gross or net?


Ut oh ... if you are resorting to guidelines ... you are already in trouble with what the consumer market is trying to foist upon you!! 

JR


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Feb 24, 2009)

> I didn't wear my wedding band. It turned out that the one that the Soon-2-Be ex-Mrs. JR bought me was EXTREMELY uncomfortable and completely not what I would wear for myself. *I ended up leaving it off after it created all sorts of chafing/irritation issues*.


Was this ring meant to go on your finger, or, uh...somewhere else. That could be the problem.


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## Sschell (Feb 26, 2009)

P.E. Luchion said:


> So when they say 1-3 months salary is is Gross or net?



ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM = 2 months take home... (don't listen to what the women tell you!)


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## dastuff (Apr 23, 2009)

The PE Abides said:


> ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM = 2 months take home... (don't listen to what the women tell you!)


And try your best to make this argument while in between jobs.


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## Sschell (Apr 23, 2009)

^ :appl: !


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## GulfCoastCivil (May 20, 2009)

I think at least $2,000. But of course that depends on your income. I believe it should at least be a months salary.


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## MGX (May 20, 2009)

Looks like it'll cost me about 2K from what I've seen. So, is the guy supposed to buy his own ring?


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## vollEngineer (May 20, 2009)

Bachelorette, here, (whose boyfriend is out looking for rings as we speak), and I found one I like for $14.

FWIW, I would just keep in mind that borrowing is a bad idea. Buy what you can pay cash for. Who wants to begin their marriage in debt? 

Back to minding my own business, now... doo-be-doo-be-dooooo


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## Sschell (May 20, 2009)

MGX said:


> Looks like it'll cost me about 2K from what I've seen. So, is the guy supposed to buy his own ring?


My FMIL bought my ring... while she was visiting Iran.


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## speedycoche1 (Jun 24, 2009)

I don't really remember what I spend on my wife's ring, but I know it wasn't near the suggested guideline of 2-3 months salary, that's for sure. My approach when looking at engagement rings was to find a ring I liked and buy it. To me, the look and getting the right ring was much more important than how much it cost... and really, I couldn't imagine putting a ring that would cost what my salary was, even back then, on my wife's hand - she is fairly petite and generally small (4' 11"), so I just don't think a bigger diamond/ring would have looked right on her fingers. And I know she doesn't typically wear big stuff either, so I went with a ring I thought would like "right" for her, and made sure to get a high quality, color, clarity diamond for it...

And she absolutley loves it and says she couldn't have pictured a more perfect ring (they all say that though, don't they?) I don't remember the prices of our wedding rings either, but I know mine was more than hers and mine is just two-toned white and yellow gold and hers has small diamonds in white gold...


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## MA_PE (Jun 24, 2009)

speedycoche1 said:


> My approach when looking at engagement rings was to find a ring I liked and buy it. To me, the look and getting the right ring was much more important than how much it cost... and really, I couldn't imagine putting a ring that would cost what my salary was, even back then, on my wife's hand - she is fairly petite and generally small (4' 11"), so I just don't think a bigger diamond/ring would have looked right on her fingers. And I know she doesn't typically wear big stuff either, so I went with a ring I thought would like "right" for her, and made sure to get a high quality, color, clarity diamond for it...


Spoken like a true engineer.

Not for anything I recall that when I was "shopping" for a ring about two decades ago, a "perfect" 1-carat (not overly huge) stone was going for ~$11,000. So (to me anyway) pricey doesn't necessarily mean big. Conversely, you could buy a 5-carat diamond for ~$3000 that was essentially yellow with black inclusions visible to the naked eye.


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## speedycoche1 (Jun 25, 2009)

MA_PE said:


> Spoken like a true engineer.
> Not for anything I recall that when I was "shopping" for a ring about two decades ago, a "perfect" 1-carat (not overly huge) stone was going for ~$11,000. So (to me anyway) pricey doesn't necessarily mean big. Conversely, you could buy a 5-carat diamond for ~$3000 that was essentially yellow with black inclusions visible to the naked eye.


Well, when I was looking, all of the rings in the size I was looking at were significantly less than that price range. The rings they showed me that approached and/or exceeded the price range I "should" have been in just didn't do anything for me, and it wasn't necessarily just about the size of the rock either. I knew that she would want something fairly simple and plain, and not something with alot of different stones/filled with diamond chips/etc... Like I said, I found a high quality, clarity, and color stone in the size I liked and put it in the band I liked and bought it...


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## Santiagj (Jun 25, 2009)

When I got married last year I gave my future wife two options. A house or an engagement ring. She went with the house which is good. I think expensive engagement rings are rediculous. The only purpose of having a huge engagement ring is to flaunt your wealth. We later endulged a bit on a wedding bands by going with platinum. The platinum bands were not that expensive, 2200 for both of them. Mine being the more expensive one because of my fat fingers. Plus they have a neat look to them.


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## Supe (Jun 25, 2009)

CZ or lab diamonds. They'll never know the difference unless they try to hock it, at which point you're probably divorcing the bitch anyways!


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jun 25, 2009)

^ It's so good to see that romance is still alive!


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## Supe (Jun 25, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> ^ It's so good to see that romance is still alive!



Hey, I'm romantic! I put big red bows on my boxes of condoms!


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jun 25, 2009)

^ Not that I should be one to talk. Today is my 2 year anniversary, and my wife is spending the evening with a 50 year old man taking the spine and vital organs out of a pig. :true: If I'm lucky, she'll catch the train that gets her home at 11:45. At which point I will be awoken by a kick to the ribs from the dog as he hops out of the bed to greet her.

:hung-037:


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## Supe (Jun 25, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> ^ Not that I should be one to talk. Today is my 2 year anniversary, and my wife is spending the evening with a 50 year old man taking the spine and vital organs out of a pig. :true: If I'm lucky, she'll catch the train that gets her home at 11:45. At which point I will be awoken by a kick to the ribs from the dog as he hops out of the bed to greet her.
> :hung-037:


Be sure to light some candles before getting kicked by the dog. For ambiance.


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## squishles10 (Jun 25, 2009)

my hubby got my e-ring from india so he got one hell of a deal. i think they paid around $7000 for it but it appraised here for a lot more. i dont trust the whole appraisal stuff though so i dont know what it would actually cost here.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Jun 26, 2009)

^ You sure he didn't mean 7,000 Rupees? Which goes for a whooping $144 here in the US.


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## snickerd3 (Jun 26, 2009)

squishles10 said:


> my hubby got my e-ring from india so he got one hell of a deal. i think they paid around $7000 for it but it appraised here for a lot more. i dont trust the whole appraisal stuff though so i dont know what it would actually cost here.


so how was the indian wedding? did you get your elephant?


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## Ble_PE (Jun 26, 2009)

I don't remember the exact amount that I spent on my wife's engagement ring, but I think it was around $1500. Luckily she didn't want a big rock and doesn't really like jewerly at all, so I didn't feel like I needed to spend a fortune for the ring. Our wedding bands are titanium and cost $50 bucks a piece, so I'm not complaining at all about them.


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## MGX (Jun 26, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> ^ It's so good to see that romance is still alive!


"Romance without finance is a nuisance!" - Dolomite

I'm tempted by the lab-grown diamonds, but my girl is an accomplished rock hound and claims she can detect synthetic rocks. I'm scared to call her bluff because I'm so clueless (I don't wear or like jewelery)!

Has anyone bought a blood diamond? I was wondering if I could buy an extra bloody diamond, one that several people have died for, that'd be a real value (value ascertained from several deaths must mean its worth a few souls).


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## RockyMtnHigh (Jun 26, 2009)

Hubby spent about $100 per ring, they are tungsten steel, no rock. We were originally going for titanium, but got the whole "cut your finger off since the metal is so strong it can't be sawed off after a bad accident" schpeel.

We're both rock climbers so we often remove our rings to avoid the heinous de-gloving that can occur. We saved on the rings and blew the money on the live band, booze, wedding food and honeymoon.


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## Fluvial (Jun 27, 2009)

My wedding ring is a blue sapphire set in a silver band with diamond chips in it. It doesn't look like a conventional "wedding ring" set. It looks kind of like this one or this one. Sapphire is hubby's birthstone and blue is my favorite color. We looked for a flush setting 'cause I hate catching a ring on stuff.

The ring cost $650.00 in 2003. That wasn't even half a month's salary for hubby. I'm of a practical mindset and didn't want to spend much on a ring. Hubby's is a plain silver band.

As far as guys wearing the band, he likes to wear his, but it's not so thick that it bothers him. He will take it off if he's welding or doing heavy mechanic work.

That being said, this is such an individual choice that there's no real way to say "what's appropriate?". Each couple and situation are different, and people should choose based upon what they want out of a ring, not what the jeweler or their friends or whomever says about it. If you want to spend $20 k on a set, go ahead, do it and enjoy your jewelry.


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## CivE Bricky (Jul 5, 2009)

I think what's been overlooked here is that those rings can be worn every day for a lifetime.

They should be something she likes and will enjoy and fit in with the couple's priorities and overall financial situation.

If I remember right, my rings were about 1400 = 700 center stone and two 350ish diamond bands (one for engagement and one for wedding) designed to nest together. The setting was lowered so it stuck out less (my preference). I've worn those rings nearly every day for nearly 16 years with the exception of swollen fingers pregnancies. I liked the idea of colored stones, but learned they wouldn't take the same punishment diamonds do. If I were getting engaged today, I'd be interested in manufactured diamonds.


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## jonstone (Dec 17, 2009)

Under 500, wait 10 years to make sure it works out then splurge,lol.


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## Sschell (Dec 17, 2009)

^ :appl:

well done!


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## Supe (Dec 17, 2009)

Since it was mentioned, what's everyone's take on manufactured diamonds?

Nearly indistinguishable from the non-synthetics, and a huge rock for the ladies to show off at a fraction of the cost. Personally, I like the idea, and being a huge dork, would prefer a manufactured one just because of the science involved behind growing them.


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## Sschell (Dec 17, 2009)

^ I totally agree... just don't tell her!


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## Ble_PE (Dec 17, 2009)

Supe said:


> Since it was mentioned, what's everyone's take on manufactured diamonds?
> Nearly indistinguishable from the non-synthetics, and a huge rock for the ladies to show off at a fraction of the cost. Personally, I like the idea, and being a huge dork, would prefer a manufactured one just because of the science involved behind growing them.


So, you starting to plan on what to buy MIAF?


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## z06dustin (Dec 17, 2009)

IlliniASU said:


> Most of our 'significant' purchases now are towards upgrading his Jeep and his gun collection. Trust me, that adds up over time!


Ok, seriously, where were you when I was at ASU?


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## wilheldp_PE (Dec 17, 2009)

ble31980 said:


> Supe said:
> 
> 
> > Since it was mentioned, what's everyone's take on manufactured diamonds?
> ...


Damn...beat me to it.


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## Chucktown PE (Dec 17, 2009)

Supe, I never thought I'd see the day. I can't believe you're going to make an honest woman out of her.

Out of respect for Supe and his future bride I would ask that we all start referring to her as MSIFAPTM.


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## Supe (Dec 17, 2009)

Sorry folks, no engagement. Engineer bling for myself is perfectly acceptable though.

MSIFAPTM?


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## Chucktown PE (Dec 17, 2009)

Mom Supe is F-ing And Planning To Marry


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## csb (Dec 17, 2009)

Like you're adding a diamond to your Order of the Engineer ring?


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## MGX (Dec 17, 2009)

Dolemite, who taught me all I need to know about women said the following:

_"Romance without finance is a nuisance"_

Any thoughts on buying a used ring and a new jewelery box? I argue that all gold and diamonds are 'used' anyways since they've been around millions of years.


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## RevMen (Dec 17, 2009)

The answer to the question depends completely on the people in the relationship.

My now-wife has had her ring for a little more than a year and she still gets very upset when she forgets to take it with her to work; she'd rather go back home to get it and be late to work than to be without it for 8 hours. I think that means I spent an appropriate amount.

I worked very hard on putting together a ring that looks good. I did a lot of research. I put all of my money towards the size, the cut, and the color, while maintaining a clarity that guarantees no visible inclusions. I bought the stone online from a Canadian seller for something like $3300. That got a little over 1 carat, D color, highest cut ratings, and VS2 clarity. Then I had a custom setting designed that was based on several styles she had seen and liked. Platinum and gold are frickin' expensive right now, so I went with palladium.

Total expenditure was somewhere around $4600, I think. Not once did I ever stop to think whether it was worth it. She still likes showing it off and I'm happy that she still takes pleasure in that. But by no means is she a vain person, especially when it comes to money. My wife has not had many nice things in her life and finally getting to have something nicer than average is really fun for her.

Your mileage may vary. Not all women would draw as much enjoyment from a ring. It's actually kind of nice that there was a way I could make her extra happy just by spending a more money. One good thing about waiting until you're after 30 to get married is you can do something like this without worrying if you'll still be able to pay rent.


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## ElCid03 (Dec 17, 2009)

Chucktown PE said:


> Supe, I never thought I'd see the day. I can't believe you're going to make an honest woman out of her.
> Out of respect for Supe and his future bride I would ask that we all start referring to her as MSIFAPTM.


Here here! Don't forget you'll have a child to support also.


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## EM_PS (Dec 18, 2009)

csb said:


> Like you're adding a diamond to your Order of the Engineer ring?


:lmao:


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Dec 18, 2009)

Does anyone wear that dumb Order of the Engineer thing anyway?


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## Supe (Dec 18, 2009)

matrix_PS said:


> csb said:
> 
> 
> > Like you're adding a diamond to your Order of the Engineer ring?
> ...



Heck yes! Slap a 1 carat in that wrought iron bad boy.


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## EM_PS (Dec 18, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> Does anyone wear that dumb Order of the Engineer thing anyway?


better quest - how many people actually have one...or admit to it anyways


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## Chucktown PE (Dec 18, 2009)

my old boss tried to start some thing in our company where we got those when we passed the PE. I'm glad it never took off and we didn't waste money on those gay ass rings.


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## MGX (Dec 18, 2009)

Its probably for the best since in the BDSM community such rings are also worn in the same fashion for 'slaves'.


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## MA_PE (Dec 18, 2009)

MGX said:


> Its probably for the best since in the BDSM community such rings are also worn in the same fashion for 'slaves'.


is this the voice of experience talking? :GotPics:


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## csb (Dec 18, 2009)

matrix_PS said:


> VTEnviro said:
> 
> 
> > Does anyone wear that dumb Order of the Engineer thing anyway?
> ...


I own one, but I have no idea where mine is at now. Our college did the ceremony at commencement and inside our diploma holders was our ring. It seemed pretty special then, but obviously that passed pretty quickly. We have a few engineers around who wear theirs, but I think it's more a "hey! look! I'm an engineer!" thing than any other reason.


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## RevMen (Dec 18, 2009)

VTEnviro said:


> Does anyone wear that dumb Order of the Engineer thing anyway?


Last summer I hiked to Machu Picchu in a group that, coincidentally, had 5 or 6 engineers, mostly from Canada. All the Canadian engineers had their rings on and took them quite seriously. They had a similar mythology to what I had heard about the rings, that they existed because of some collapsed Canadian bridge and that the rings (or the original rings) were made of steel from that bridge.


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## RIP - VTEnviro (Dec 18, 2009)

Yeah I was making fun of it one day and there was a Canadian engineer (doig grad in the US) with us that looked at me like I just insulted hockey or Kraft Dinner.


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## csb (Dec 18, 2009)

^ awesome


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## Chucktown PE (Dec 18, 2009)

What is Kraft Dinner?


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## FLBuff PE (Dec 18, 2009)

RevMen said:


> VTEnviro said:
> 
> 
> > Does anyone wear that dumb Order of the Engineer thing anyway?
> ...


One ring to rule them all...

+100 LOTR


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## EM_PS (Dec 18, 2009)

RevMen said:


> VTEnviro said:
> 
> 
> > Does anyone wear that dumb Order of the Engineer thing anyway?
> ...


Article appeared in July issue of PE magazine:



> HistoryThe Order of the Engineer ceremony was modeled after Canada's Ritual of the Calling of the Engineer. That ceremony began in 1926, using a wrought iron ring and an oath written by poet Rudyard Kipling. As a common legend goes, the iron for the first rings was collected from the wreckage of the Quebec Bridge, which collapsed twice during construction in the early 1900s and killed more than 80 people. As an article in the October 2001 Engineering Times explains, according to legend, using materials from the failed bridge for the rings reminded Canadian engineers to be humble.
> 
> However, according to Jacob Jeswiet, a professor in the mechanical engineering department at Queen's University in Ontario who was cited in the Engineering Times article, that story is a myth. Jeswiet's research indicates that the rings were never made from the bridge materials, nor were they meant to be a reminder of the collapse. Instead, Jeswiet said, the iron ring ceremony was set in motion in 1922 when seven Montreal engineers met to discuss professional solidarity and the engineer's societal responsibilities. They then asked Kipling to write the ceremony because he had referred to engineers in some of his work.
> 
> ...


full article : http://www.nspe.org/PEmagazine/pe_0709_Called.html


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## Supe (Dec 18, 2009)

How... gay.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.


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## benbo (Dec 18, 2009)

When I saw Supe's name in this topic, I had to check it out.


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## EM_PS (Dec 18, 2009)

Supe said:


> How... gay.
> 
> Not that there's anything wrong with that.


suffice it to say anything so dearly prized by our Canadian friends is not very likely to be so highly esteemed anywhere else...except maybe Ohio


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## Flyer_PE (Dec 18, 2009)

matrix_PS said:


> ...except maybe Ohio


Go Blue! LOL


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## RevMen (Dec 18, 2009)

I knew there wasn't truth to the rings being made from a bridge! One of those guys swore up and down that it was, and that his father's ring was one of the originals.

Conclusion: Canadians lie.


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## EM_PS (Dec 18, 2009)

RevMen said:


> I knew there wasn't truth to the rings being made from a bridge! One of those guys swore up and down that it was, and that his father's ring was one of the originals.
> Conclusion: Canadians lie ain't too bright eh?


fixed it.


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## Chucktown PE (Dec 18, 2009)

But being named Bobby Jacko is pretty cool eh?


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## Slugger926 (Nov 3, 2010)

Just go to the Diamond park in Arkansas where you can dig your own diamond. 

In 2001, I got my wife to be a nice half carrot, then got a 1/2 carrot wrap for the wedding. When we got back from the honeymoon, we had them welded together. The same set would cost about double today. I think I spent 800 for the ring and 800 for the wrap.


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## Supe (Nov 4, 2010)

Wow... I never thought I'd see this thread bumped from an actual new post!


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## wilheldp_PE (Nov 4, 2010)

Supe said:


> Wow... I never thought I'd see this thread bumped from an actual new post until I decided to pop the question to MIAF!


Fixed that for ya.


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## Supe (Nov 4, 2010)

wilheldp_PE said:


> Supe said:
> 
> 
> > Wow... I never thought I'd see this thread bumped from an actual new post until I decided to pop the question to MIAF!
> ...



Booooooooooooo.


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## FusionWhite (Nov 4, 2010)

When I proposed I was still a very very broke college student. I ended up buying a ring for $300 on ebay and even at that price I ended up eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for a few weeks. Honestly Im not even sure its a real diamond.

For our 5th anniversary (June 2010) I bought her a much nicer ring.


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