aaaaarrgghh! I am WOMAN! Hear me roar!

So what if I'm new in the office and very few people know me.

So what if I look 19 instead of 30!

THAT DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO CALL ME [SIZE=14pt]LITTLE GIRL[/SIZE]!

Yes, I am old enough to have graduated from college. Yes I am an engineer. Leave me the F*** alone!

Sorry, just had to vent!

ldman:

someone actually called you a "little girl"???! wow. I would be furious too.

I've never been called that, but I work with a lot of older folks who have kids in high school or college. Sometimes I get treated like their daughter which drives me nuts.

^^^ I don't blame you. When you have a private moment, I would say something to the offending person because you don't want that type of behavior to persist or even worse, escalate. Take some time to cool off and then approach them.

FWIW - I have always found you should give anyone an oppurtunity to remedy a faux pas regardless of how well that person should have known. If they don't make good on the oppurtunity you give them - shame on them!

:2cents:

JR

I think you now have license to call him a stupid f*ck. but maybe JR is right. :dunno:

but I would not let that stand.

Actually, they don't call me A little girl, they call me "little girl" as if it's a nick name or something. There's are three guys who do it, but I don't even know their names! It's usually only on Fridays, so I'm thinking they are probably field guys who come in Friday's to submit their timesheets.

The guys I actually work with are generally pretty good. It's just these jack-a$$es who haven't gotten used to having women in the industry.

Are these guys in a lower position than you? Maybe they feel threatened by a young woman, new to the company, in a position above them. Next time, I would just say something like "Hi. I'm not sure we've been introduced. My name is Amy." (or whatever) Hopefully they would catch the hint

...or "f*ck off, loser" works too ...though it might get you a new nickname

While I agree with the emotion of kicking in their teeth for this, I'd be a little cautious. The factors that come into picture are:

Do you like the work that you do here?

Do you like working for this company (if we condone these f*tards for a sec)?

The reason is that outright confrontation, while extremely satisfying, may create a permanent thing in the workplace. I agree that this needs to be addressed, but maybe you should talk to your manager or their supervisor or both regarding this. This would not only bring the issue to their attention, but they may actually do something about it or suggest some alternative solution.

Just my :2cents:

Okay.

That may top the time when I was at a seminar and got asked who's wife I was....

I would be saying something to some one, either a supervisor or the offenders them self.

If I had a dollar for every time I tell some one where I work and immediately get asked if I'm a secretary there...

TXengrChick said:

Actually, they don't call me A little girl, they call me "little girl" as if it's a nick name or something. There's are three guys who do it, but I don't even know their names! It's usually only on Fridays, so I'm thinking they are probably field guys who come in Friday's to submit their timesheets.
The guys I actually work with are generally pretty good. It's just these jack-a$$es who haven't gotten used to having women in the industry.

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The fact that you are 30 but look like 19 is something to take in consideration. By the way, have picks? Kidding here. Now, seriously.Key words are field guys. These type of induviduals are the ones that probably spend 75% out of their homes. They have some kind of freedom and usually have beers every night after job and hit on women if they have the chance. They think very high about themselves and trully believe they can say and do whatever they want. They are looking at you as a thing or a price and I will not be surprised if they already made bets about who is the first one to go out with you. The "little girl" thing is a trick to try to gain points with you and they assumed you were going to like it. Now, here is the problem, that trick would work on almost 75% of women but not on a woman with above average intellegence( i.e. engineer). They probably don't think you are an engineer and if they know, they refuse to accept it. The best strategy against these guys? Ignore them. They will go away as soon as they reallize you are way over their league. That will silently gain you respect and avoid a stupid confllict at work place, even when you are at no fault.

Good luck.

TXengrChick said:

So what if I'm new in the office and very few people know me.
So what if I look 19 instead of 30!

THAT DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO CALL ME [SIZE=14pt]LITTLE GIRL[/SIZE]!

Yes, I am old enough to have graduated from college. Yes I am an engineer. Leave me the F*** alone!

Sorry, just had to vent!

ldman:

Click to expand...

:bowdown:

WOW! I think y'all are more worked up about this than I am

Basically, since these are field guys who are only in the office once a week or so and I'm moving to the new engineering building at the end of next week, I don't expect to see any of them more than once before I move. If any of them say anything next week, I will calmly hand them a copy of the company harassment policy, which is VERY strict (I've already got copies of it on my desk just waiting for them). I have also rearranged the pictures on my desk so that my husband and child are displayed VERY prominently

As for looking 19, I can't help it (although the older I get the more I like it!). I'm used to having people ask my daughter if I'm her sister or her mommy, being carded for ANYTHING age restricted (I even got carded going into an R movie last year), even being asked if my parents are home if I answer the door! The only time it bothers me is when people don't take me seriously in my work.

Thanks for all the support, and suggestions. I think for now, I'll just keep quiet, and only call them stupid f**ks under my breath And of course give them a not-so-gentle reminder of what could happen if I did decide to go talk to their boss.

TXengrChick said:

As for looking 19, I can't help it (although the older I get the more I like it!). I'm used to having people ask my daughter if I'm her sister or her mommy, being carded for ANYTHING age restricted (I even got carded going into an R movie last year), even being asked if my parents are home if I answer the door! The only time it bothers me is when people don't take me seriously in my work.

Click to expand...

Now you are showing off. Where is the proof? :bio: Don't believe you. :GotPics: Bluff bluff bluff. Good option the one of the harrasment policy in your office. That will give the guys a clear signal.

Good work Sapper. That ought to make the women feel welcome.

Thanks for clarifying - that makes sense.

Totally off topic - what happened to the fast reply button?

It can be tough being a female engineer. I've been in the profession a long time and dealt with some real a--holes. I've developed a bit of a smarta-- personality, too, and if someone said,"Hey, little girl" to me, I'd probably say, "Hey, LITTLE boy" while holding out my pinky finger to demonstrate size. This won't work in all circumstances, but it might shut them up. BTW, many of my strongest male opponents grew to become very strong supporters. Also, there are women who can give you just as hard a time as men.

Sapper,

When I first read your order, I thought it was a joke - vary Draconian! Are you sure it's lawful? It seems punitive beyond what Article 15 allows for restriction under NJP. Of course, I'm no lawyer... Just curious.

I work with a lot of contractors and have the same problems - I look young, I'm a woman and I also live in Texas. I've found the best way to deal with "field guys" is to engage them in conversation about what they do and sound intelligent, use the slang they use etc. If they think you know what you're talking about they will probably leave you alone.

Sometimes you can't do that, so I've also found having a smartass reply or coming up with an equivalent negative nickname for the most vocal of them will put them in their place.

The problem is you want to be taken seriously, but if you throw a fit and try to force them to take you seriously it will probably backfire. Sometimes there is no other way to handle it besides getting and their face and telling them to F@#$ off or going to HR.

Good Luck!

Whoa, all of this talk is kind of sucky.

If it means anything, all of the young (and older) women at my work beat down the guys!!!

Edit: Yeah!! Finally a veteran!!!

kevo_55 said:

Edit: Yeah!! Finally a veteran!!!

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Congratulations !!!! :multiplespotting: :multiplespotting:

Super Nana dance in your honor ...

JR

SapperPE said:

IlPadrino: It is lawful, it was given to me by the SJA who recommended imposing it, and we are on a very small FOB, so it is really only limiting interaction with a small group of females. And to be fair, it is actually not written as simplified as I have posted it, but I had to do some editing so as not to let slip any details and just post the shell of the document.

Click to expand...

I guess this is the reason I like the military. Justice is unencumbered by far left leaning ideology that personal freedom can never be restricted. But I should stop writing before this thread gets off-topic!